Losing my mind over potty regression

[Bizziee]

After a very stressful year of potty training I thought my 4 year old was finally in the clear. He's been amazing the last couple of months but out of nowhere a few weeks ago he started having accidents very regularly. Not just wees though, poos. Just today he has pooed himself 3 times and the frustration I'm feeling is really starting to push me over the edge. He doesn't do this at nursery, he pees himself maybe once but never a poo and at home it is constant no matter what I do. I have alarms set every few hours so I can make sure he goes to the toilet. He'll have a wee and a poo and an hour later he has pooed himself. He knows how to use the toilet and can go himself but he gets so absorbed watching TV or playing that he doesn't go. Last week he completely soaked through my sofa and has wet his bed more times than I can count. I've tried reward charts but he isn't interested and I'm at a total loss on what to do. There hasn't been any major changes either to his routine except that he's slowly having more contact with his bio dad. I feel like I've tried everything at this point. Any help and advice would be greatly appreciated, I am one stressed out mummy.

Have you taken him to the GP? Having so many poos doesn’t sound usual so it does sound like there is more going on than just toilet regression. Are they fully formed solid poos or are they loose or just small smears? It sounds like it could be overflow from constipation which can cause both wetting and the soiling accidents.

I haven't taken him to the doctor's just yet but have been thinking I should. I thought I'd tackled the possibility of constipation too after flushing him through with prune juice but maybe I need to do it again? Now that I think about it he does do a lot of small poos, semi formed but not solid looking compared to his usual poo. Do you really think that's what it could be?

I don’t have much advice to offer but I can assure you you’re not alone. My daughter of 35 months has been going through a potty training regression on and off for months now, and I’m at my wits end. Feels like everyone else has it sorted except us. She doesn’t seem bothered by the wet feeling on her legs, and this is such a contrast from the eager potty trained little lady that she was before. I’ve heard that making it all a bit of a pain for them when they have an accident (eg tell him to change his clothes himself), minimise eye contact and chatter so make changes as boring as possible (ie not rewarding) can be helpful, but I’m yet to find our way out of this prolonged rut. You’re not alone - sending hugs x