Hi, just looking for advice or similar experiences.
My 5 year old is basically out of control at home in the last 6 months he has broken our tv by hitting it repeatedly with a toy and broken his iPad by smashing it on the floor repeatedly, he took it out of the protective cover before doing so just to make absolutely sure it would break. He gets so angry and seems to have no control. Things that set him off are falling out with his older brother, being told off for something more minor or told he can’t do/ have something, he also hates to be remotely criticised. I honestly feel like I’m dealing with a narcissist. He will throw things at me and hit and kick me. He also really helpfully as heard the F word from his teenage step brother (used towards me on a few occasions) and now will say it when he’s angry. I’ve started to not handle it in the best way yelling at him things like it’s always you why is it always you, your nasty, so naughty. He is just so arrogant and walks around like he’s untouchable. He had a meltdown at his grandparents yesterday over being told off for a bit of petulant pushing and shoving between him and 7 year old (just told to stop and separated them) he throws the nearest toy at me so I removed him from the room and tell him he’s lost his games and football cards. He try’s to hit and kick me and then just lays on the floor saying the F word saying he’s going to break grandparents house, house is trash anyway. I just felt mortified. He will carm a lot quicker if I stop and just hold him and calmly speak to him but sometimes it’s so hard. At school and football club he is an absolute angel, I’m told he’s a role model he doesn’t get involved in any of the arguing with the other boys, he’s kind he’s polite. He’s got the most house points in his class for good behaviour. They told me they couldn’t speak highly enough of him. I do see this at home as well and he can be the most loving adorable little boy. As a bit of a backstory my step son who’s 15 moved in with us last year who has ADHD and has outbursts of anger, regularly swears at me and his Dad and basically shows a complete lack of respect for anyone. I know this obviously has had a huge impact on my 5 year old but this situation isn’t showing any signs of changing so my question is how to I help my 5 year old. I remove his toys and games but he just never seems to learn and even if warned he’s going to lose them he can’t help himself but cross that line. I flip from feeling like I want to give him lots consequences like removing him from his football team which he loves and taking all treats away like days out and having friends over to play to just wanting to scoop him up and cuddle him as he just seems so pent up and out of control.