Page 2 | Nursery want to use "Time Out"

Ally24 · 2008-03-13T21:36:54+00:00

My sons nursery have asked about using time-out on my son, i.e making him stand still on his own for 1 min per year old he is. He is only 16 months, I didn't think time out should be used until abou 2years. Am i right? At home i normally don't let him get his own way but reassure him when he gets upset rather than punish him. Any advice?

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Original poster

Ally24 · 13/03/2008 22:07

i will definatelty tell them i'm not happy about it, buts its quite worrying they think its appropriate

OP posts:

blueshoes · 13/03/2008 22:07

16 months is too young for that kind of time out. Ds is 17 months, he does not even understand when he is being naughty, so how can time out work, if he can be made to stand still at all.

cadelaide · 13/03/2008 22:08

I just cannot imagine it on my 20m old, or my other dcs at that age.
How d'you get them to stay in one place?

(Actually I never cracked that at any age!)

Heated · 13/03/2008 22:13

If they are giving him 'time out' away from the group with another member of staff to calm down, that sounds good practice...but, if by 'time out' they mean to separate him by himself then no, that's not appropriate for a child without the language skills to understand. The point of time out for older children is to reflect; not something I can picture a 16m old doing!

mamazee · 13/03/2008 22:18

I am REALLY shocked by this ...and quite angry
He is a baby still..how can they even suggest it.
Poor you..i agree i would be worried about any nursery that even suggested that to me. I think
you said it is 'new' nursery so maybe that is why he is a bit unsettled.

Only saving grace is that they asked you before they did it .
Just be VERY VERY clear what you want.

luckylady74 · 13/03/2008 22:19

My dtwins preschool (so all at least 2 1/2 yrs) only uses distraction. They do remove a child if they are violent, but that is to calm down and talk not to punish. My dd(3) had tantrums when she was settling in - it was frustration at not being understood and anxiety in the new situation - they very calmly just ignored them and made a huge positive fuss of her.
Immense stupidity and jumping on the supernanny bandwagon imo!

soph28 · 13/03/2008 22:26

I think it's a bit young but I successfully used time out for both mine from 18mths.

I've got to admit that I thought they were too young to understand but didn't know what else to do as I didn't want to smack and they wouldn't understand rewards etc. However, it did work and they did understand! At that age I only used it if they continued to do something unacceptable after they had been told not to i.e. hit/bite, throw toy at someone- that's about it.

Once you have used it a couple of times usually the threat of it is enough to stop any behaviour. My dd (20mths) will sit there for a minute and when I go through she says, 'soso' (sorry) and puts her arms out for a cuddle.

soph28 · 13/03/2008 22:26

I think it's a bit young but I successfully used time out for both mine from 18mths.

I've got to admit that I thought they were too young to understand but didn't know what else to do as I didn't want to smack and they wouldn't understand rewards etc. However, it did work and they did understand! At that age I only used it if they continued to do something unacceptable after they had been told not to i.e. hit/bite, throw toy at someone- that's about it.

Once you have used it a couple of times usually the threat of it is enough to stop any behaviour. My dd (20mths) will sit there for a minute and when I go through she says, 'soso' (sorry) and puts her arms out for a cuddle.

crazyjimbob · 13/03/2008 23:22

So what other strageties would you be using then, all posters who do not agree with using time out??

Asking as an interested person not as a critic?? What worked for you? Sometimes removing from situation is best method of distracting, - not saying time out is best, but perhaps removing from situation is good tactic!

And who is Alfie Klon????

16mths does seem young and my hubbys opinion is that it is too young - and thinking about it properly I agree with what you are doing already

He thinks you should ask nursery how they have come to that conclusion (do they have "evidence" it works/ is correct way to do things etc??)

colditz · 13/03/2008 23:52

The Supernanny Team does not seem to recommend the naughty step (which is a form of time out) for under twos.

Considering the level of ignorance the nursery seem to be displaying, Supernanny will probably be taken as a child care authority, and will be beyond reproach.