A 4 year old boy in DS's nursery class has had a preliminary diagnosis of AS (or possibly autism, or possibly something else altogether. We are in Ghana. He is going to UK for evaluation next month.)
He's a sweet little guy, very cuddly, always smiling, but also strokes the other children, hangs on them, pulls hair. He's not mean, but his attention can be a bit much for them. His communication skills are not great, so it can be difficult for the other children to understand him and play with him.
This afternoon a group of us mums and kids were having a little playgroup, when one of DS's little classmates comes running out of the playroom fussing, as the little boy had pulled her hair. He followed her and pulled her hair again. So DS comes out, steps up to boy and yells, "No!" and hits the boy in the chest. DS is the world's most non-aggressive child, and I've never seen him hit anyone before. Oi no, I say, apologise and get yourself over here for a chat. (The boy's mum had also pulled him aside for a no-hair-pulling talk.) DS very upset, and tells me, but Mommy teacher said we should do to X whatever he does to us.
Maybe he misunderstood the teacher, I think to myself. But another mother overheard him and said, no, my son came home yesterday and told me she'd said, if he pulls your hair, pull his. If he hits you, hit him back.
!!
So, two questions. What to do with the teacher? And what suggestions do you all have on helping DS and his classmates get along better with the little boy. Clearly that guidance won't be coming from his teacher!