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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Dealing with losing

5 replies

Mumtoboys1 · 20/11/2023 21:03

Does anyone have any tips on how to help children who can't handle losing? I have already gone through hell with it with my eldest and now the same is happening with my youngest who is 7. We play games together and if I am any good/ he doesn't win everytime he will get in such a bad mood/hit himself ect. It never used to be so bad but it's just gotten worse and it's so much to handle all over again I worry I won't have the patience to be so compassionate and understanding this time round I'm already worn down. He has self esteem and confidence issues anyway which I try my best to help but this whole new chapter is relentless. Any tips would be helpful.
I know This probably comes across as I'm horrible and unfair on my child but I am desperate and broken down

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LondonLovie · 02/12/2023 09:46

I couldn't read and run, other than to empathise. My DS is nearly 10 and awful at loosing. We are away this weekend and last night my DH beat him at Chess, and it's almost ruined our weekend away! DH won't give in and let DS win.. DS looses his shit every time! It's a nightmare, and I either shy away from winning or playing with him at all.

Sorry it's not advise, but I really get it. It's awful and unless someone has a child like this they wouldn't understand why it is so hard!

SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 02/12/2023 14:57

Both of my two have got frustrated from losing, although not to that extent. It sounds hard to deal with, especially when you just want to play a fake with them.

I don't know if this article helps at all?

My other suggestion would be to get him to try Cricket. The teams always shake at the end of a game and it's usually a very supportive sport for DC.

Original poster

Mumtoboys1 · 02/12/2023 19:02

Thanks for replies!
I shy away from playing too and winning! It's awful it makes the whole experience draining, makes it even worse that my 2 just don't seem to get along with each other at all in general, they need constant handholding with all their interactions or it's chaos!

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LondonLovie · 02/12/2023 21:07

My two are the same! Honestly, everything is a squabble. I can play a game one on one our DD, but as soon as DS joins in all hell breaks loose and we have to find a way they can both win.

Original poster

Mumtoboys1 · 03/12/2023 00:39

It's so difficult because we know the issue is not to do with the games specifically it's something that can affect so much but at the same time I want to ban the games when they get too mad cause it's all just overwhelming and seems hopeless

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