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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

If your child was starting Reception in September, would you be concerned if...

43 replies

Ripeberry · 11/03/2008 21:47

He or she did not know their numbers 1-10, got colours wrong, could not tell you what a square was?
I help out at pre-school and quite a few of the children are like this, especially the boys.
And they all seem to be from the big famillies. Its as if their parents don't have time to teach them anything.
Lots of friends have said they don't spend so much time with 2nd or 3rd DC, what hope is there for DC 7 or 8?
Just wondered if anyone else has come accross this as well?
AB

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beautifuldays · 11/03/2008 21:50

no i wouldn't be concerned. that is what they are going to school to learn

i would be more concerned that they knew how to put on their shoes, do up their coats and wipe their bums to be honest!

kama · 11/03/2008 21:50

This reply has been deleted

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peanutbear · 11/03/2008 21:50

My son is starting school in September and he cant count to ten well as yet (just mastered 5)

he is my DS2 and I have a dd aswell all children learn at different levels my oldest whose birthday is August was one of the youngest and he could do all of these things, but ds2 just isnt interested yet

TheOriginalXENA · 11/03/2008 21:54

Yep, I have four DC's and I increasingly find myself stretched beyond my limits.. I am dreading reading with a third child, when the next one starts reception in September.

magnolia74 · 11/03/2008 21:55

If they are not starting till september some of them are still only 3! Is it really so important to know what a square is?

And please tell me why on earth being from a big family has anything to do with it?

I have 5 children, all of whom have learnt at different ages. Parenst need to teach their kids practical things rather than educational, makes it a whole lot easier for the teachers in reception

ComeOVeneer · 11/03/2008 21:55

I'm not sure. DS can count to 20 (backwards and forwards), recognises loads of shapes and colours, can type his name into the computer and negotiate the cbeebies web site. But can't dress himself, never puts his shoes on the right feet, is failing miserably at toilet training and can't use a fork to pick up food. I guess they all develop differently.

magnolia74 · 11/03/2008 21:56

Believe me a child doing his/her own shoes up or going to the toilet unaided is way more valuable than knowing what a square is when they 1st start reception

ComeOVeneer · 11/03/2008 21:56

He is still only 3 btw.

Lizzylou · 11/03/2008 21:56

My son is starting school in September and he knows all the number/colour/shape stuff, but is awfully messy at eating/wiping bum stuff. That worries me a whole lot and he is DS1, with me trying every day to help him!

magnolia74 · 11/03/2008 21:57

ComeOVeneer, That was not directed at you btw

moodlumthehoodlum · 11/03/2008 21:57

I'm not hugely worried, and dd thinks that you count to ten via sixteen and eleven, and she starts Reception in September. (and she is PFB of two dcs) but it must get harder the bigger family you have.

TheOriginalXENA · 11/03/2008 21:57

beautifuldays- DD2 doesn't do anything for herself.. at home DD1 does it all and at nursery she has made friends with a girl very like DD1, so her friend helps her with shoes/ coat etc (thankfully not bottom wiping )

moodlumthehoodlum · 11/03/2008 22:00

As this is my PFB, and I am slightly worried about dd starting reception in september, please can we have a "checklist for things your children need to be able to do when they start school" thread, in about June, when I still have time to do something about it please ?

seeker · 11/03/2008 22:00

I suspect this is a "how dare the working classes have big families" thread. Mega apologies in advance if I'm wrong - but I can't see any other reason for it.

Heated · 11/03/2008 22:01

I assume, unless there is a LD or EFL, that most children would know this too by reception, but it would depend on what else they knew! Certainly amongst DS's friends who are 3-4 yrs this is knowledge they have.

I totally agree with the latter part of beautifuldays post about the importance of social skills, but I disagree with the first part as I wouldn't assume it's just down to the school to educate, imo it's my role as a parent too.

hotpotmama · 11/03/2008 22:03

No I wouldn't be and won't be. Had DS1 start reception in September. His birthday is in January and he knew his colours, numbers etc.

DS2 starts school this Sept, his birthday is July, he will be so much younger so cannot expect him to be at the same level. Being 6-12 months older makes such a difference in my humble opinion.

Boys are very different to girls and I think its a bit of a sweeping statement to blame the parents. It completely depends on the child as well.

You may not have as much time with subsequent DC's but they gain in so many other ways.

ComeOVeneer · 11/03/2008 22:06

Don't worry magnolia, you post echos my concerns exactly. BTW it could only be aimed at me if you are a mind reader (look at our posting times)

TotalChaos · 11/03/2008 22:19

yes of course any possible developmental problems MUST be the fault of the parents neglecting their kids .

terramum · 11/03/2008 22:21

Children don't need 'teaching' to learn things, especially at this age - they need to be able to play & find things out for themselves. Some children will pick things like numbers colours & shapes really easily & some will be ahead in other ways...

The large families thing is also a complete myth.

Oblomov · 11/03/2008 22:23

Ds is 4.1 He is starting school is sept. he can do all these things , count to 20, squares, type name, plus coat, shoes and wipe bottom o.k.
But I think alot of this has to do with him attending nursery p/t.
Plus, mainly becasue I read some great threads last year and took a few notes about how to help/prepare ds.
I don't think that these are big issues.

FairyMum · 11/03/2008 22:23

Hmmm....the larger families a red herring I think. In our school the younger children from larger families especially come across as quite advanced. I always thought because they learn from their siblings.

FAQ · 11/03/2008 22:24

no - not concerned at all - infact you could almost be describing DS1 when he was still at nursery - he recognise his name, and count (but not really understand the counting) to about 15, couldn't really read at all and drawing skills were still zero. He's a september baby.

DS2 on the other hand can count to 99, knows all his colours, shapes, can write his name, and is starting to recognise letters phonically.

I have done nothing in particular with either of them and TBH if DS2 was the same as DS1 was I still wouldn't be worried.

Ags · 11/03/2008 22:26

Actually, I find that little ones from big families with older siblings are often more advanced than my ds (eldest of 2) as their brothers and sisters egg them on to learn things that they are learning in school.

stuffitllama · 11/03/2008 22:27

I don't think they are big issues either and I wouldn't be worried. I think being able to manage the loo and the pegs and the PE kit and the playtimes are much much more important. I am sure of it.

Oblomov · 11/03/2008 22:33

moodlumthehoodlum, there are loads of great threads, check the primary section:
This one i found good:
primary
lists things like shoes, coat, pulling sleeves so they are the right way round, opening bananas & crisps ( funny ds has had no problem with those for ages - ha ha), wiping bottoms etc.
Very helpful.

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