Hi
My DD is 4 and in Reception. We are going through what i hope is just a very tough phase at the moment. I keep repeating the mantra that this phase will pass but right now, I need some advice on how to best cope in the moment. I will add at this point that we have had some contact with the SEN specialist at school and DD is having counselling in school. These feel like separate issues but may all be part of a bigger picture.
Anyway, to the problem. DD's sleep is not good. She has gone from being a good(ish) sleeper, going to sleep independently to needing me to sit in her room each night until she falls asleep. She then wakes once, sometimes multiple times per night at which point I have to go and get into bed with her until she falls asleep again. Sometimes she will go straight back over without any intervention e.g. if i say "it's the middle of the night, time to go back to sleep" but this is becoming rarer and rarer.
Despite being very active, it takes DD a long time to drift off. Most nights I am sat for one to two hours waiting for her to sleep. We occasionally have better nights where it takes around 15 minutes but these are few and far between. If i leave she lays screaming and crying and does not give in, this could go on all night.
Coinciding with this, she has now decided she hates going to school as she misses me too much. She has never been a clingy child until all of this. The last two school mornings, she has woken up crying on waking because she doesn't want to go to school. I have managed to cheer her up and be ok about school but once there, she has cried at drop off saying she doesn't want to go. Today she was extremely upset and the teacher had to take her from me.
How can i make bedtimes easier on us both? What can i say to her to realise that school is fun and we're only apart for a few hours at which point i will be collecting her (I work school hours so do drop off and pick up).
The only thing that has changed for us is that DD gave up her nighttime dummy of her own accord, the problems seem to have stemmed from there. She has never mentioned it since, never asked for it or anything. She was very adamant she was too old for it and didn't need it anymore (we have tried for years to get her off it but she definitely needed it for comfort).