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I need help

15 replies

beansmum · 10/03/2008 19:52

Had the worst evening. Think I need a day off before I go completely mad!

My mum phoned me and as I was chatting ds came and threw a huge seashell at the dog in front of me. I took it off him and sat him back at the table to finish his dinner. He then got a mouthful of water, came through and spat it on me. I sat him down on the floor in the hall and he pulled the cord on my hoodie so I was strangled. Then he told me to shut up and hit me. I put him in his room and closed the door and carried on talking to my mum until I saw a piece of wallpaper being pushed under the door. When I put the phone down and went into his room ds had wet himself and pulled a big strip of wallpaper of the wall by the door.

I put him to bed early. He was really upset and I was really upset and the dog was upset. Everyone was crying and I feel like poo now. And a rubbish mum. Help me please!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
luckylady74 · 10/03/2008 20:00

It sounds like attention seeking (because you were on the phone) that escalated and the wetting himself really reminds me of my ds1 because that was always his way of saying things had got way out of hand.

I really think you can kill this with a mixof kindness/ignoring/distraction and that will make you feel better.

Give him loads of positive attention and when he's awful move on from it as quickly as you can - to remind him that there are more exciting things to do than be naughty.

No you are not an awful mum

soph28 · 10/03/2008 20:00

Oh that sounds like a bad evening poor you! You sound like you need a hug and a big glass of wine or G and T.

How old is ds? That is really unacceptable behaviour but it happens. Was he just attention seeking cos you were on the phone?

Don't worry, we all have days like that. I'm sure tomorrow will be better and it sounds like he was sorry. You are not a rubbish mum, you did what you could in a really hard situation- I think I would have done the same!

A rubbish mum wouldn't care about the behaviour!!

swallowsandamazons · 10/03/2008 20:02

Not rubbish just normal, sounds like a day here, ds loves to wind the dog up, and hit his sister. I have no answers, but will watch to see if anyone else does.

KerryMum · 10/03/2008 20:04

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beansmum · 10/03/2008 20:09

ds is 3.5, he has always been so good. I just don't know how to deal with him without getting upset. I usually just sit him by himself but it doesn't seem to bother him. He was upset today because I closed the door on him for the first time and just carried on talking but now I'm not sure if I did the right thing as he was so upset. I gave him a big hug and a kiss when I put him to bed (without a story, also for the first time ever) but explained that he had been nasty and I didn't want him around when he was behaving like that.

I DO need a drink, only have christmas booze left over, white port or sherry.

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TidyTink · 10/03/2008 20:11

My DD does all sorts when im one the phone too, she will do anything to get my attention, agree with ll74 that maybe he just did a wee because things had got out of control

Your not a rubbish mum, you deserve a medal i think i would have thrown a strop myself had it happened to me

TidyTink · 10/03/2008 20:13

you did the right thing, i denied DD her bedtime story last wk for bad behaviour and felt v guilty but it worked and there hasnt been a repeat performance

KerryMum · 10/03/2008 20:16

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beansmum · 10/03/2008 20:37

great. that gives me something to look forward to! I feel really sad that I sent ds to bed crying but I think I may have got through to him for once.

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KerryMum · 10/03/2008 20:45

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beansmum · 10/03/2008 20:47

Just went to check on him. He's all curled up and tiny with his thumb in his mouth. How can someone so small and cute drive me sooooooooooo mad!?

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KerryMum · 10/03/2008 20:48

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minkulus · 10/03/2008 20:51

Darling Beansmum - Huge hug!
you did the right thing and he will have forgotten the emotions tomorrow, but hopefully not the consequences
I expect he's sound asleep now and looking angelic. Go take a peek - all's well with the world

minkulus · 10/03/2008 20:51

oops cross post

snooks · 10/03/2008 20:52

It is a mystery to me how someone so small can drive me to the the extremes of over-whelming love at one end and to the depths of despair and frustration and anger at the other end of the scale.... often within the space of about 5 mins lol

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