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Behaviour/development

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2yr old rejecting grandma

1 reply

hhmama · 16/10/2023 08:59

My DS is 2 this week but for the past year or so, he has been displaying a general dislike for my mum. He has four sets of grandparents as DH and I both come from families of divorce and he doesn't show this behaviour with any of his other grandmas or grandads. As he has begun to approach the terrible twos, this behaviour has gotten much more forceful and upsetting to watch. He won't have her touch him most of the time, if she tries to engage with any play with him he just shouts 'no' at her. She can get him to giggle and laugh if she turns it into a silly game but it quickly reverts right after. She does say that when DH and I aren't there, he's perfectly fine and they actually have a nice time. I also know from my own observation that his mood seems to improve when we are at her house instead of at home.

I have wondered if its to do with her being so similar to me. Our voices are almost the same and we have similar mannerisms, I wonder if its possible that this makes him uncomfortable when we are both in the room.

What is really tricky is that my mum is probably the most helpful of all the grandparents. She comes to visit for days at a time and supports us as we are due our second in a couple of months. She was there for DSs birth and is good with helping us cook and clean when things are getting on top of us. I was really hoping that she would be able to come and look after DS when the new baby is here but I think it could be more stressful if he behaves in the way he has recently.

Has anyone else experienced this and have any tips that might help the situation or do you think we really need to just wait it out?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Marie199201 · 28/08/2024 11:47

Hi, i appreciate this post is from a while ago but I am having a very similar experience with my DS & MIL.

He is completely fine with her when it’s one on one but when myself, husband & other family members are present. He says “no, Nanny” a lot and doesn’t like her interacting in activities but on the other hand sometimes he goes to her to play etc. - I’m worried I am enforcing the behaviour by constantly referencing it. My DS is very independent and I think sometimes he can find her a bit overbearing.

Im just wondering how things progressed for you and if you did anything that made a difference?

many thanks in advance!

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