one year old development

[crazylegs312]

Hi, i dont know if im just overreacting as I'm a first time mum or if this is actually something to be concerned about, but my son (neary 13 months) just had his developmental appointment and his problem solving is a worry. I've always been concerned about this as he tends to play with toys in a particular way. He loves when things wobble and spin so he makes things wobble a lot. He'll press buttons on toys and guides me to put stackers on top of others and blocks on top of each other.

Same with clapping hands, he guides my hands together but won't do it himself. He plays hide and seek with me and loves his books. I just dont know how to help him do things on his own, i feel like ive tried anything. Does this sound like a normal one year old or should he be doing more?

How did he score on the questionnaire, do you know? A section or two in the grey is very common (it's designed such that roughly 1 out of every 7 or 8 babies will score in the grey), and not usually anything to worry about. Did the HV or whoever did the developmental review give you any activities to do with him to help encourage those skills?

He doesn't sound wildly out of norm for a one year old – I'd have said being able to stack things themselves tends to emerge over the next few months, for example. Lots of one year olds will clap – but if he uses other gestures, it doesn't really matter much that he doesn't clap himself yet.

his fine and gross motor skills are in the white, completely fine, communication was low grey and the problem solving was dark grey, but hes actually had a pretty big learning leap recently and i think has made a lot of improvement!

I tried to explain to her that he never really has the need to point. If he sees something he wants, he'll just go and get it, won't point at it. He doesn't wave at people, he'll just crawl up to them and put his arms up. And yes she gave us lots of activities to try! we've tried scribbling on paper with him but he was seriously not interested in that, nor was he interested in clapping two blocks together. I've been sent another questionnaire for him asking pretty basic questions, so im guessing they're trying to understand exactly where he needs the help

Pointing is a bit of a special gesture, compared with, say, clapping, because what it shows is actually quite complex mentally. Firstly, 'following a point' means understanding to look where the finger is pointing, not at the finger itself. Then they have to realise that you don't automatically know what they're thinking – you don't necessarily know that they want a biscuit out of that cupboard out of reach or you haven't necessarily seen the big exciting bus over there. Then they have to realise that they can deliberately get you to focus on the same thing they are, by pointing. And in the case of the bus, there's the added factor of wanting to share the experience with you – they don't need help with something, they just want you to see it too!

All that said, lots of babies aren't pointing yet at 12 months. Some are, but for lots it emerges between 12-15 months, and isn't 'late' until 18 months, which is ages yet.

Scribbling is another one that will probably start to appear in the next few months (although for many, only for a few seconds at a time, then on to something else). Has he had a phase of clapping/bashing toys together earlier on? That is an extremely common form of baby play, but I think my two were pretty much over it by 12 months. In terms of teaching him to do things himself, will he let you guide his hands instead of him guiding yours? How did he learn to do things like feeding himself or using a sippy cup?

this is a very late reply so sorry! but he doesn't like me guiding him very much. Hes always had awesome hand eye coordination, feeds himself and uses his sippy cup. I genuinely believe he just plays a different way. Still not clapping, but still loves guiding me to clap. He has started shaking his head and nodding. Its the same with his speech really, he has babbled, but he just seems content not talking? i mean i talk him through everything, i point everything out to him and he just doesn't seem interested