7yo doesn't care if she wees or poos herself

[Butwhynotmethough]

I'm completely lost and don't know what to do for the best. 7yo DD just started year 3. In the last couple of weeks she's wet herself twice at school, once through the night, and today she pooed in her knickers at school and sat in it all day. She doesn't seem to care!

The first time she had asked to go from class and been told no as that's policy at school. She was too desperate to wait so wet herself. Same happened the next day, so I spoke to school office and teacher and they all agrees she could go from class if needed. Told DD so she knows she can ask. That night she wet through the night, that hasn't happened for years, she didn't seem to realise she'd done it despite having got up for a wee when she woke in the morning, her pj's were drenched but she didn't notice?! Today she's pooed in her knickers at school and not told anyone.

I don't know what to do. Do I speak to school again? Do i go to the doctors as if she isn't feeling cues early enough is that a doctor problem? I don't want her to start getting picked on as the girl that wets/craps herself but she genuinely just shrugs it off.

I should add, of course I've sat and tried to get her to tell me if anything is wrong here, at her dad's, at school, she says everything is good, she's happy, no problems.

Bump, anybody?

Hi, my son is exactly the same. He’s 8 years old. He goes for wees during the day no problem but will not go to the toilet for a poo. He still wears nappies for bed and quite often holds his poo in for days until it’s so big it really hurts him, and when I say big, it’s bigger than an adult size. I home school home as I don’t want him to be picked on. He’s always had an issue with having a poo. He wasn’t fully toilet trained when he went to nursery and they “forgot” his potty was there so he held it in all day and in all honesty we think that’s been a real issue for him ever since. if it’s been too long I have to give him movicol to help things move shall we say. It’s good that you have spoken to her and asked if there was anything wrong. I know I haven’t given any advice there but just wanted you to know you are not alone x

It's happened twice at school in last few weeks but what is it like out of school? I mean has she always had accidents? Or have these incidents at school completely thrown you as it hasn't happened for years? They are 2 different things. If it has always happened during day I wouldn't worry just washing machine and repeat and she will get there. A night time accident I wouldn't worry about at all at 7. However if she has been fully accident free say since age of 3 and suddenly having accidents this could be something else (what I don't know though)

Shes been generally fine for years. She does seem to have to go immediately, there doesn't seem to be much warning at all (for wees) so then if school say no she's totally stuck, but then she's allowed to go now. I just can't work out what could be making it all start now.

If it's a sudden change then I would definitely get her checked by the GP.