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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Have a parents meeting at nursery after horrendous OFSTED report. How do I know if DS1 is where he should be in terms of development.

19 replies

sparkleymummy · 26/02/2008 15:09

He's 3 in mid april. Can anyone help me with what he should be doing in terms of development so that I can discuss it sensibly with the nursery. So far they've just said "he's fine" but I want to be a bit more specific than that.

OP posts:

phlossie · 26/02/2008 15:39

look here www.babycentre.co.uk/stages/4400/ and here www.babycentre.co.uk/toddler/development/milestonecharts/31to36months/

WallOfSilence · 26/02/2008 15:40

Is it up to the nursery to help him develop?

Twiglett · 26/02/2008 15:43

is he enjoying it? how does he socialise? (would expect him to be playing alongside) does he have any special friends?

I think these are the only things you need to know at nursery level

Original poster

sparkleymummy · 26/02/2008 15:49

Wallofsilence do you not think the nursery should have any part to play in his development? He'll be there pretty much full time in a few weeks.

Twiglett Yes he enjoys it. He's very sociable. He has a different best friend every day but two in particular are mentioned a lot.

Useful links Phlossie thank you

OP posts:

Niecie · 26/02/2008 15:50

What do you mean by nursery? Do you mean day care type nursery or a playgroup type?

How many hours a week is he there?

What exactly is wrong with the nursery?

MN does their own developmental milestones - go to the home page and look at Your Child on the left hand side.

Twiglett · 26/02/2008 15:50

no, I meant those are the types of questions you should be getting the nursery staff opinion on

LIZS · 26/02/2008 15:51

What are you trying to drive at ? Do you have concerns - physical, emotional , behavioural, practical, academic ?

At 3 they are just beginning the Foundation Stage but benchmarks aren't very meaningful as range of "normal" development at that age is vast. This is the outline the nursery should be working towards from aged 3 to end of Reception Year , by which time your ds will be 5 1/2.

Desiderata · 26/02/2008 15:53

Nurseries aren't there to teach reading/writing and that sort of thing. They allow them to play creatively, and keep a diary of any social observations, how well they get on with model-making, colour and number recognition, circle time, etc. There shouldn't be any pressure applied, though.

Do they keep such a diary at ds's nursery? That would give you some indication.

WallOfSilence · 26/02/2008 15:54

My ds is at playgroup 3 days a week. But I don't need to ask them how he's developing, I can see it quite clearly

I would want to know how he plays with his peers & if he seems happy & confident there. Everything else is relative really

Original poster

sparkleymummy · 26/02/2008 15:55

Its day care. He'll be there four and a half days a week from April.

The report rated the nursery as unsatisfactory for everything. In particular it said that children were not where they should be in readiness for school and that the way in which they are "taught" is not ideal and that children seemed to be either badly behaved or quiet and withdrawn.
We have decided not to change nurseries because he's very settled there and I don't think its as bad as the report says but I do want this meeting to see how he's doing.

Will have a look at the MN page thanks

Sorry twiglett - not concentrating properly as a result of screaming teething baby.

OP posts:

LIZS · 26/02/2008 15:57

has more detail on the areas of Fodunation Stage.

LIZS · 26/02/2008 15:57

Sorry this

TheHonEnid · 26/02/2008 15:58

well I'd hvae to be 100% convinced to keep my kid there after that

would be worried tbh

happystory · 26/02/2008 15:59

Good link, LIZS.

At this stage I would consider asking if he is independent, (ie asks for things he wants) plays with a range of toys, interacts with adults and children, follows the routine, eats well (if he's there all day)

You should be able to tell a lot of what he's been doing by what he brings home, paintings etc.

What aspects of the Ofsted report worry you? Perhaps you should start by asking what they're going to do about the recommendations ofsted will have given them

Twiglett · 26/02/2008 16:00

I'm not that convinced on Ofsted reports tbh .. I feel that personal knowledge is equally valid

I'm also not that keen on the whole early strategy directed from on high either .. I think the focus should be play, play, play

happystory · 26/02/2008 16:03

Sorry took me too long to post that.

I too would be very worried about unsatisfactory for all areas, but give them chance to say how they intend to fix things...if not convinced, I'd change. He's got at least another year and a half there.

there are plenty more nurseries.....

Reamhar · 26/02/2008 16:05

There is a lot to be said about your DC being happy and settled in his current nursery, but if their OFSTED report is dire I have to say that it would be ringing alarm bells with me.

Maybe the question is not that they have got a bad report, as much as what they intend to do proactively to gain a good report next time? If their response is a big fat nothing, then I would definitely being looking around for another nursery.

That?s my opinion, but you know what?s best for your own DC. Given how much nurseries charge for their services, I expect them to be doing cart wheels to keep me happy, but then that's just me.

Niecie · 26/02/2008 16:20

I only ask what sort of nursery it is because if it was a few hours a week playgroup type I would move but obviously if your DS has been going there for a while and is happy then it isn't so easy.

What you really need them to be doing is providing lots of activities, lots of opportunity for play and learning through play with staff supporting the children, reading to them, encouraging them and helping them think things through. If they aren't doing this properly they need to say what they are going to do to change and quickly.

However Ofsted is just a snap shot of what a nursery is like. Maybe they had a really bad day. Also a lot of time schools are criticised for not having systems and checks in place but actually the way a child cared can be fine. If you think that it is OK and are willing to give it a bit longer to see how things go then it probably is OK. Were you surprised it was a bad report or were people expecting it?

HonoriaGlossop · 26/02/2008 17:13

I wouldn't necessarily be swayed by OFSTED either. In fact I probably wouldn't want ds to be in a place they would say was excellent if it meant they were focussing on 'teaching' and 'preparing for school'.

preparing for school can be such a crock IMO. Children are ready for different things at different times and do not need to practice things at 3 just because when they are 4 they will be doing them.

The only thing I'd be concerned about is the comment on behaviour; but of course having been taking him there for a while you may be more qualified to comment than OFSTED on how happy and well behaved the children are.

Main thing for me would be kind and loving and affectionate staff and absolutely rock-solid safety/locked doors and gates policies.

In terms of your meeting I wouldn't focus on your DS' development too much, if you're not worried then I'm sure he's fine. And when he DOES go to school, they do not assume that any child has necessarily been to daycare of been prepared in any way. It's a fresh start.

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