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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

persistent biting in a 2.6 year old ds?

10 replies

cathshuck · 19/02/2008 20:20

What do I do? He only bites me. He has bitten me so hard that he drew blood through jeans. Am now at the end of my tether as its every day.

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lollipopmother · 19/02/2008 22:21

Oh blimy, that sounds awfully painful. What have you done so far to try and stop it? When did it start and is there anything you can think of that started it off? I can't actually help you but there are lots of people on here with really helpful advice that might be able to help if they knew a bit more about the situation. I hope someone helps you soon.

Mummywannabe · 20/02/2008 08:05

HI cathshuck, please don't despair lots of children go through this especially before their speech allows them to articulate everything they want to say!

Best way of dealing with it is to be absolutely consistant: a firm no, and then ignore and sit away for 2 minutes (or whatever you feel comfortable with, they key is you must do exactly the same thing each time and ensure he doesn't get your attention from doing it). It wil pass i promise, at the nursery i run i have seen about 3 out of 10 toddlers go thorugh this stage ( been doing it 10 years so a fair few nashers!)and it usually passes in 6 weeks or so at most. good luck!

Looby34 · 20/02/2008 08:25

hi cathshuck - i read somewhere (famous last words) that if you can try not to react by saying/shouting 'owwww' and then move him away from you and walk away - his behaviour is not then rewarded by reaction. I imagine you wouldn't even need to say 'naughty' as your actions would show him it isn't acceptable. Bite and Mummy goes away type thing ??

Like I say, I have only read this, I haven't tried it but it might be worth a go ?? Best of luck.

Original poster

cathshuck · 20/02/2008 15:43

thanks will try those things. Has been going on for at least a year so I hope it passes soon x

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Pennies · 20/02/2008 15:47

DD2 does this - my step mum siad she had the same problem with her daughter and she was at the end of her tether so one day she just bit her back (obv. didn't draw blood) but enough to show that it hurts). Her DD never bit again. I am considering this course of action myself with DD2 but it has it's obvious issues that I'm wrestling with internally before I decide on whether to follow the advice or not!

PanicPants · 20/02/2008 15:48

cathshuck - ds did this for ages (he is 2.5) and, touch wood, he seems to have stopped. We gave him time out EVERY time he did it. Which did work, and he always said sorry afterwards. He tended to bit other children as well as us though .

However, he has moved onto spitting and hitting, when he can't get his own way. We are using timeout for these and it does work.

Main thing, is to have as much lack or reaction as possible. We say 'timeout' in a bored sort of voice, and put him in time out. And he sits there until he has calm (about 1-2 minutes) and usually calls out 'sorry mummy'.

I have seen a great improvement so timeout does work. At hime he is great, it's jsut if he is with other children he's a problem!

Original poster

cathshuck · 20/02/2008 20:34

Pennies am ashamed to admit that when he drew blood I bit him back as my mum said she did it to my brother. It made no difference - he laughed in my face. Normally he is a lovely little bly its just this one thing. We have a naughty spot but am going to do a reward chart and reinstate it I think as have got a bit lax with it X

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frecklyspeckly · 27/02/2008 21:26

I have a ds who is 3.1 and she bit me yesterday (near the boobie) and it realy really hurt! We were at a mum and toddler group and all the women were saying to bite her back but I couldnt do it, but I took her home. Obviously this worked wonders though because she bit me again today, despite a whole afternoon of her saying sorry to me yesterday. My crime for deserving this? looking after someone elses baby while the mum went to the toilet. Not the first time but it really was sore. I just couldnt, couldnt bite her. How do you judge how hard to do it? I think a smacked hand or telling off would be better than a bite. I dont condemn those who do but I could not.

1066andallthat · 27/02/2008 22:17

OK - if you have searched on biting - I'm sure I'll appear in one of my many aliases . My DS2 had the longest phase ever of biting - started at 8 months and grew out of it at 3 and a half.

Like dieting, I tried everything and nothing worked. He used biting as a form of expression.

A year on, it seems an aeon away. I think with that great gift of hindsight, you go with telling him it is not acceptable, tell him the behaviour you'd like to see, move away from him, if you think it'll help. Then, remember how little he is and move swifty on.

As the cliche goes, "This, too, will pass". It is horrible - you feel awful. It hurts but he will stop.

QueenieUK · 03/03/2008 14:44

My DS is now 19 months and is biting at daycare when he can't get the toy he wants. We've discussed the issue with his nursery and their suggestion is to keep his dummy in his mouth permanaently for a week and then try to wean him off it over the next three weeks.

I'm not keen because I'm concerned that his language will suffer and that it's just a convenient management tool for them rather than a solution for him.

Help and sympathy sought....
Queenie

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