My son when with his friends and at school is really well behaved and never shows signs of hitting or hurting others, and has a very good record at school. Which is good as it shows he knows how to behave and control his frustrations. And around 80% of the time he's really good with me.
However at mine and mum's house he's a complete different child. Although recently he's getting better, I think it's cos he can get outside and do more now the weather's better. He has moments where he will hit and kick and throw things at us. He's strong and he can really hurt! He doesn't care of any consequences, I've used money everytime he hits he pays £1 and is rewarded back for good behaviour, this worked for a short while, then he just stopped caring about receiving money. Now he gets £1 for good behaviour for pocket money.
Every time he hits or kicks now ill put him on the stairs for a minium of 5 minutes, where this just makes matters worse, although he will stay and eventually calm down he will kick and hit my stairs that hard that they will break, he's even pushed me down the stairs in frustration. Eventually though he will calm down and say sorry. But the cheek of him will say after I'm not sorry and putting him on the stairs won't make any difference. I use this in conjunction with a tablet ban, then he'll winge and winge he's bored and got nothing to do and screech. I go with it and explain he doesn't have it unless he behaves well usually when he's on his bans he'll stop hitting, but as soon as he's allowed back on he'll start again. There's no pattern to what sets him off, somtimes it's like there's a switch he can go from sweet and kind to aggressive and anger over the slightest of thing which can in turn become a battle.
I need a way that will work to stop him from hitting and hurting us.