Fears developing in 21mth old. How do I handle? What did you do?

[blackrock]

My ds 21mths has developed fear of having hair cut (has masses of curls but now very long), teeth brushing and of falling/being dropped when held.

This is despite no untoward events happening.

He doesn't fight me, but sad tears roll down his cheeks and he sobs when I try to do these things.

Do I just persevere, while he deals with it, or is there another way?

Advice/experience, please.

Just wondering how you know he's scared of falling or being dropped?

When i am holding him, as I loosen my grip to place him somewhere, or put him down, he gasps, sometimes calls out in a slight cry and almost pinches me as he tightens his grip. It's starting to happen more and more during everyday lifting e.g. into seat at the table. Also he doesn't like games involving lifting as friend's children do. Is this just a short phase?

I don't have any experience of this tbh, sorry, I'm sure it is something he will grow out of though.
In the meantime, maybe you could work on putting him down on the floor from standing, with you sitting down or kneeling on the floor and putting him down from there so it's not as far, IYSWIM.

That way you could pick him up and put him down so he gets used to it. Or maybe when you go to put him down somewhere tighten your grip on him and say reassuring things.

As for teeth brushing, maybe, if you're not already doing so, give him the brush to just hold at first while you brush your own teeth and encourage him to put it in his mouth himself and brush them, then you could buy another toothbrush and try brush his teeth gently and for a few seconds at a time while he has got a brush in his hand too. Let him brush your teeth with your brush too.

As for the hair, you could try snipping one lock off at a time though that might give very uneven results! Or let him hold a pair of those blunt plastic scissors and let him 'cut' your hair, and make a game of it like the teethbrushing.

Thanks for replies. We live in remote place and don't have much family, so thanks for your replies. Will try them. Good luck with OT LeonieD

I found it helps to turn things into games. For example, when DD was scared of the scissors and didn't want me to cut her hair, we went around the house together with the scissors and she cut (or tried to) all tags from all clothes & soft toys. Now she actually quite likes scissors and wants to cut everything, but on the brighter side, she is no longer afraid of hair cuts.

You can do the same with fear of falling. Turn it into a game. Throw him up (just a little of course) and catch him. Laugh lots. Do the same with teddies and other soft toys. Laugh more.

I hope that helps.

Went to a really cool kid's hairdresser, Nipper's in Exeter. No tears, fuss, movement, what a turnaround!