Toddler Tanrtrums

[checkmate1984]

Hi all

Would like to get some advice from you guys.

I have a 2 year old who gets angry quite lot, he finds things to chuck on floor, whatever comes in his way he chucks on floor. Our parenting issue at present is we get angry at that and give yelling and put him in naughty sofa for him to calm down.

He does hit people at times too, today nursery told me, he hit another child with toy as he got angry and wouldn't share. He did say sorry and hugged after.

An example for today was, he didn't have his dinner and just wouldn't eat. We thought a cake might bribe him, but he just kept getting angry and chucked things on floor and wouldn't touch the dinner but we gave in and gave him the cake.

Whats best way to overcome this, as dont want this to go on for long time as im just worried he could become used hitting people in school etc in future. Any tips/pointers be appreciated

Thanks

Why are you shouting and getting angry at your two year old toddler? What do you think this is going to achieve? How to expect him to be calm when you can’t even model that behaviour yourself? You cannot moan about your child shouting and “throwing a tantrum” when you are literally throwing the adult equivalent. As for the naughty sofa - really??? Your child is not naughty fgs he is a toddler figuring out his emotions

imagine if somebody put a plate of food down and for whatever reason yog didn’t want it but they insisted and was trying to bribe you. I think eventually you’d snap too!! If he doesn’t want to eat, then that’s fine, he is ALLOWED to say no. Toddlers don’t owe you an empty plate, perfect behaviours, zero mood swings. Adults (including yourself) experience mood swings except we can vocalise in a way children and toddlers can not.

I would suggest following big little feelings on Instagram and fb. There’s a quote and it says toddlers aren’t giving you a hard time they’re having a hard time. A “tantrum” is when they need your love the most not anger

Like the last poster, I'm a little surprised that you shout at your 2 year old and then complain that he shouts as well.

DC are wonderful little mimics and if you are modelling dealing with anger and frustration by shouting, well, that's exactly what he's going to do as well.

If you are having trouble with how he behaves, have a read of Little Angels by Dr Tanya Byron.

As for the food, it's perfectly acceptable for a two year old to refuse dinner. Small children are wonderful at regulating their food intake so if he does refuse, just assume he's not hungry and let him get down when everyone else has finished eating.

This guide offers some good pointers on what to offer him and how to deal with fussy eating.

By giving him cake you are just teaching him that by refusing to eat, he gets cake and who wouldn't prefer that option?

Are there any obvious triggers for the biting? Is it when he's hungry or tired? How are Nursery dealing with it and have they suggested anything to you?

Have you read 14 ways to stop hitting and biting?