How to put baby to bed when they can't sleep or even nap in separate room until 6 months according to NHS guidance

[teaandkittehs]

Hi all, I am struggling with this as the title suggests. All guidance suggests having a bedtime routine from 3 months or so, but NHS says they can't sleep or even nap in a separate room until 6 months old. So are we really meant to do a bath book feed routine and then just bring them back to the lounge with lights and tv on? I feel like the guidance doesn't address the huge chasm of am issue with this. Our 13 week old wakes at any noise so it can be quite stressful. I've spoken to friends and they have all tried different things. One watched entire series with only subtitles to keep noise down. This won't work for us, I have an 11 year old step son who has the right to use the lounge too and can't expect him to be silent even if we could be! One friend let the baby nap in crib and used a monitor and frequent checks (against guidance due to SID S risk). Another went up to bed early and just watched stuff on her phone so the baby didn't sleep alone (sounds hideous and could go on for months). At present, we have her sleeping on my lap post-feed in the lounge and we just try not to make loads of noise but we can't live in a silent world so she does get disturbed. This is leading to a potentially bad habit as I pop her back on the boob to get her back to sleep so now she is relying on sucking to get to sleep. How does everyone with this? Thanks

You've spotted one of the many NHS logic fails, IMO.

I started next to me cot naps earlier than 3 months as a way to have DS accept the cot for overnights more easily & to allow me to shower/use the loo. I kept an eye on him via a video camera with audio & breathing detector under the mattress. A little OTT in terms of tech for me, but DP loves his tech. Then the only thing you could argue he was missing was someone with him, but that was solved because I could be there within seconds of him waking.

Very early on DS couldn't handle any distractions, especially lights, chatter, TV or my phone, so this was the only way to get him some sleep without me also sitting in silence in the dark which I was not prepared to do.

Fair warning though, he was never a good sleeper but he's now 6 months and a terrible sleeper. Not sure what's connected to what.

Thanks for your response, the guidance is so incongruous and is silent as to the elephant/baby in the room! I'm considering putting her in the crib with a monitor and frequent checks from four months. I don't feel great about it but the status quo is hard to maintain. At present she sleeps well at night but people keep warning me of an imminent hellish sleep regression la la la not listening 🙃

I've always had my two sleep on my knee as they both fall asleep feeding. Most people I know go up to bed early with sleeping baby,

[sorry, baby on my knee moved and posted that before I finished!] either upstairs to bed early or have Moses basket in the living room for them to sleep in.our next-to-me has a removable bassinet so in the early days we could bring it down in the day time and carry it upstairs for night sleeps. Neither of children have really wanted to sleep in their crib/cot anyway (and baby currently has chickenpox so no chance!) hence me still sitting up with a wakeful baby.

Thanks for responding. Having her on.my lap keeps going wrong as she wakes at the slightest noise so I don't think it will work for the next few months, the same with having her sleep in her pram in the lounge - it's just impossible to be quiet enough for her. It just seems like there is no easy answer, and going up to bed at 8.30 with her sounds a bit of a nightmare as it's so early and she is usually asleep by then! It just seems there is a gap here that can't easily be addressed 😞

Our DD is nearly 5 months and still downstairs with us. We go up at 9pm.

She is starting to sleep at 7ish now so in a month or two we will start her in the next to me (in our room) I am Bfeeding in the night so having her in our room for the next few months will work better for us.

Not sure when we will start cot naps.

Our eldest DD is still using the cot bed so not yet. Lol

I'm definitely going to.keep her.in our bedroom with us overnight until 6.months, and we go to bed at 9.30pm, but she can sleep.from 7.45pm sometimes and its so hard to.stop her.being.woken between then.and 9.30pm! Am considering.putting her in crib for final hour before bed from 4.months with a monitor and checks as I'm in constant fear of wake ups, I don't get. much sleep.so. really. Don't want her to be awake.until.11pm following a wake.up. it's so tough! Excuse full stops, one handed typing as baby sleeping on hand.