can boisterous 4year old boys, with no interest in 'learning', succeed at school?

[jude555]

my son is almost 4 and in a nursery attached to the school he will attend. He is very boisterous and lively, and with relatively low concentration levels but is happy and compliant. He is on a sticker chart and I am being talked to every day virtually, but they keep telling me he's just a lively little boy. He can't cope with the whole day (which most are managing) and I think 9-1.30 everyday also seems too much for him. Will he be ok or are heading the major problem route? I teach teenagers with ADHD and I don't think that's his issue, but everyone keeps telling me he'll calm down etc but so far no sign. He's not wild, would just much rather be outside than sitting drawing, but that's what they have to do. I find it very difficult to not worry and just accept that it will all sort itself out.

Well everyone else has said it but I'll repeat

He'll be fine

He's only 3 fgs! What do they want him to do excel in quantum physics!

Have to say though, boys are like puppies, they need to be exercised for an hour or so outside every day come rain or shine. I found it help a bit. Does he get much opportunity to let off steam and run around outside?

You're right, it is hard for some of the more physical boys - in some ways, at 4, I have found that to us (with a ds) it feels that 'school is for girls'.

DS has a great teacher and the school is a good one but the fact remains that much of what he does in the school day is a big effort of 'reining in' for him and for alot of the other boys too I'm sure.

i don't want to be glib and tell you it will all be ok. It might well be and I hope so! But yes it is hard for some boys.

how can a child have 'no interest in learning' when everything he does is 'learning', every time he plays

nursery children are boisterous and lively and learn through play .. he sounds perfectly normal ... and nursery thinks he's normal

my DD may well be the same age .. she'll be 4 in May .. her nursery is 2.5 hours a day and will be like that for another term .. that is standard here

don't worry .. it WILL sort itself out

I see what you mean Twig. It's not good to assume that all girls always want to sit down with their colouring in

I have found though in my ds class that it isn't the same effort to rein themselves in as it is for my ds plus there's the fact that if you are a girl who is six within weeks of starting year one, you are in a completely different place developmentally than a boy like my ds who was only just five on starting year one and has co-ordination issues as well.

I can see that school is a different experience for my ds and the older girls in his year

Spot on Twiglett. The boy/girl thing irritates me too.

Well, ignoring the boy/girl thing, IME it is extremely common for 4 yos to need time to settle into school. Dd's first teacher once told me that the first year in reception is mainly about puppy training.

This does not mean that they are not going to do well academically later in life. An experienced teacher should be able to cope with the younger sort of child and be able to provide an interesting school day for children at different developmental levels.

And the level you are in in infants doesn't stay with you through life; my dd moved steadily up the sets during her years in infants.

I was worried about my ds who was a summer baby and very much of a baby, and it is true that he is still (at 7) at a fairly low reading and writing level, but he is enjoying school and he is definitely learning things. His teachers seem to like him and he gets on well with the other children.

I think in this case gender is pretty irrelevant. He is very young to be expected to sit still drawing for large portions of the day without some physical or more hands-on activity to balance that out. And Twig is spot-on that everything they do is 'learning' at this age.

Find him a vent. let him run and run and run all the way home, or something similar. It helps ds1, who is nearly 5 and actually doing ok in school.

You know, Einstein did not speak properly until he was about 9yo. He was apparently useless at maths. He performed unremarkably at university and then when he was working as a lowly patent officer, he wrote a scientific paper that completely revolutionised physics and which revealed him to be an absolute genius. Most great scientists take a concept and build on it. Not Einstein, what he came up was completely new, ground breaking and pushed the boundaries of physics as never before. Nearly 70 years after he first came to the fore, scientists now are still grappling and trying to understand the implications of his work.

Moral of the story, you cannot predict how 4yo child will turn out!