What consequences do you give your 4.5 yr old?

[LittleMG]

My little boy has always been very easy going but is feeling his feet. I’m not reacting well by firstly trying to avoid an argument/deescalate things and then snapping badly when he finally drives me over the edge. He adores me (and I him) and time spent with me is always what he’s after, so removing myself is always a good threat (like leaving him at bedtime if he won’t get into bed tonight I just turned the light off and walked out) but he goes nuts and it basically makes things worse.
what are some good, healthy consequences that are not cruel or hard to enforce?

Have a look at How to talk so little kids listen - lots of ideas there. Focuses on fun and connection to achieve compliance rather than traditional do as I say or you loose x approach. I've found it works better - of course there are always going to be days where nothing works but I just felt awful going down the shouting / punishment route because that's how I was brought up and I didn't enjoy it as a kid at all. I wanted a different route with my kids.

thanks for the reply! I have got that book and do try to follow the principles bit I do feel that I’m pacifying and jollying along too much and DS is taking the mik a bit, pushing and pushing and me diverting until things really escalate too far.

Have you tried 2 choices? If nothing else works I normally use a that plus a short explanation: I can see you are having fun / want to x, the problem is we have to y. I'm sorry to have ask you to stop, do you want to x like a horse or have a race? Or similar. It's exhausting some days though.

Thanks I’ll give that a more concentrated go x

Look up natural consequences, perfect for this age