School refusal 6 year old

[ilkleymoorbartat]

My DD is in year 2. Before Christmas out of blue she started saying she had stomach aches. We've been to the gp a few times and they can't find anything wrong.

It's now progressed so that she's hysterical every morning before going to school and had to be peeled off us. We've had meetings with the school who are doing things to try and say there is nothing else wrong. She's smart and does well. They say once she's in the classroom she's fine.

We've spoken to her about it, and can't get to the bottom of what's wrong or why this has suddenly happened. It's really awful and I don't know how best to approach it. At the moment we're just trying to be super calm but firm about it, whilst also being empathetic. Any advice ?

I was wondering if something like a bravery chart would work but I don't want to pile the pressure on her.

I guess I would be wondering if something happened at school to start this all off? She's probably a bit young for bullying to rear it's ugly head - what does she think of her teacher?

Or is it pick up related? Has anyone been late to pick her up and now she's worried she won't be or what does she do after school? Could she be unhappy there is it's after school club or childminder/family?

We've asked her and the teacher multiple times if there's anything that's happened, and both say no.

She really likes her teacher too and friends seem fine as well. We do all the pickups and drop offs. And she doesn't do any after school clubs.

Interestingly though I had to ask a close friend of her mums to pick her up a few weeks ago, becuase I was stuck at a doctors appointment. But she seemed fine about it afterwards and had a lovely time at her house.

The only other thing that I can think of is her finding the playground free time after lunch overwhelming. The teachers have kept an eye on stuff going on and haven't spotted anything, but she often says her belly hurts before lunch.

I don't know what I can ask the school to do if the issue is at playtime though. She says they're no allowed back in the classroom then.

Sounds like it might be lunchtime connected then? Is something happening whilst she's eating lunch?

We've totally racked our brains and asked her multiple times, but nothing is really sticking out. We've started giving her a packed lunch in case it's that. But she says she doesn't even know what she's worried about.

Just unsure how best to support her. I've bought a cbt book about kids and anxiety. We've spoken to the schoool. And we're trying to not make a really big deal of it at home.

There's a book called Permission to Feel which is about helping kids to talk about and identify their emotions and feelings. Sorry I can't remember who wrote it but it might help too.