Worrying about development for 12 month check

[Scirocco]

DC is (just!) 11 months. I stupidly looked at the ASQ for the 12 month check and now I'm worried!

In communication, they don't point. They're really chatty, play games, understand some basic instructions... But I've not seen them point yet.

In gross motor, they furniture cruise but tend to use both hands when moving. And they're only just at the stage of standing unaided for a few seconds. They can walk a reasonable way (across a room) holding both my hands or a walker, but I'd say they're putting too much weight on their support for it to be considered 'just for balance'.

In fine motor, they enjoy playing with balls but don't throw them.

In personal/social, they don't throw balls and they don't hug stuffed animals. They have stuffed animals and dolls that they like and play with by holding and stroking (and hitting and throwing, which is apparently very funny... poor Peter Rabbit is frequently airborne), but they just don't seem that into hugging them. But they hug me, DH and the family pets.

How bad is this?

The thing with the ASQs is that they're trying to capture a range of development and that babies don't all do things in the same order, so they never expect 6 yeses in a section – it's usually about 4. Here's the scoring sheet for 12 months: https://naturopathicpediatrics.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/ASQ-3-scoring-sheet-12-months.pdf.

If the questions you mentioned are the only ones where you'd say 'no' or 'sometimes', it sounds like they're doing fab overall. They might be in the black or grey for gross motor, depending on exactly how you answered the questions, but a month is still a very long time at this age. They could well gain a couple of those skills in the next few weeks. It's also really common to have an area or two in the grey – something like 1 of every 7 or 8 babies will score in the grey for a given area – and usually it's nothing to worry about, just not what baby was focusing on at the time.

Thanks, that's reassuring. Plus, they pointed at nursery today, so that might move to 'sometimes' rather than 'not yet'.

They're much more into people and activities than stuffed animals, so until I read the ASQ I wasn't that worried, as they're really affectionate with people and actual animals. Maybe I should encourage them more with stuffed animals... Today's attempt was quickly dismissed in favour of crayons and scribbling.

Your childs behaviour sounds totally normal for their age, try not to worry.

Thanks! Caught up with one of my mum friends in real life today and feeling much better - sleep deprivation and stressing about the health visitor does nobody any good!

Hi, just thought I'd post a short update.

DC is almost 12 months old now and doing well. Their ASQ scores as of yesterday are...
Communication 55 (white)
Gross motor 35 (borderline grey/white)
Fine motor 55 (white)
Problem solving 50 (white)
Personal/Social 45 (white)

It's been reassuring to watch them playing alongside other babies their own age - chatting with other parents we could see how all our DCs have their own individual strengths and are focusing on different aspects of development but are all in the same normal range of development.

Also realised that DC might be less into walking because they use crawling to keep up with the cats when playing!

That's a great update @Scirocco