Head banger

[Nina2]

My ds is just 14 months and I know that it's pretty common for children of this age to bang their head on things out of frustration. However, he really does appear to be hurting himself. He gets into such a state, finds a door frame or floor and bangs the front of his head hard on it. He then looks at me and cries, so he's obviously trying to send me a message which I'm just not getting.

I've tried distracting him, ignoring him, checking whether he needs his nappy changing, seeing if he needs a snack or a drink, all the usual. It's worse when he's tired, but he wakes in the early hours if he sleeps too much in the day.

I've used signs since he was about 6 months old but he's never shown any inclination to use them back. Any advice please as it's driving me nuts!

It is frustration and it is heartbreaking to watch sometimes.

But it is a phase.

It's best to ignore/distract but if that doesn't work remove him to a softer place ( cot/bedroom maybe?) and leave him to it. Give him a quick cuddle when he's finished and then carry on with whatever you both were doing.

It will get better as he gets older an dis able to communicate better.

is he wanting to go out? you could ask him? my ds3 would kick the door when he wanted to go out. i just started talking to him as if he understood - just having a conversation about him wanting to go out and me trying to cook the lunch, then explaining after lunch we would go out etc. he began to understand what i said and helped with the frustration aswell as helping him to express himself with words quite early on.

another thought is a cranial osteopath - we took ds1 to one as he use to press his head up against the bed when he tried to get to sleep and it worked wonders - something about tight plates in his skull, he slept like an angel afterwards.

also sounds like you answered your own question about him 'waking too early if he sleeps too much in the day' - if i let me ds3 sleep for 5 minutes in the day i know we are truly doomed at night as he just doesn't want to sleep.

My gf ds head-banged and she was just advised to make sure he wasn't hurting himself (i.e. dashing his head open) & if he was to move him and let him get on with it but to totally ignore him. He grew out of it at about 2 and a half when his speech improved.

14m can be quite young to drop daytime sleeping altogether. Say he wakes at 7am, is it possible to put him down at 12.30-1 for an hour and then bed at 7pm? My ds got beyond tired in the day and I had to reintroduce a sleep & sort of sleep train him, otherwise he's be grotty and cry from about 2pm until he went to bed.

Thanks for the advice. He does sleep during the day (sorry if I gave the impression that he doesn't), he has a couple of hours in the afternoon and occasionally about an hour in the morning. It's just that he gets tired again close to teatime. He's always on the go and is never still - a bit of an 'all or nothing' child!

I hadn't thought that he might be getting cabin fever and might want to get out. He's never in all day, but still might need more outside time. We've a small house and our kitchen is such that he can't be supervised safely while I cook, so he's stuck with the lounge and small hall while I'm making tea.

I just hope that he grows out of it sooner rather than later. Might have another push on the signs too.

Think your plan to get him out in the fresh air sounds like a good one .

Sorry I did misunderstand about the sleep earlier. He might be at that stage of needing to drop 2 sleeps and go for 1 at about middayish, they seem to at about that age.

Just another thought but if he's always on the go but needs a bit of a challenge, have you considered something like Tumbletots?