Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

horrible day

19 replies

madame · 02/02/2008 19:55

Please just need to let off steam

DD 2yrs 4 months, teething and has mouth ulcers so is feeling crap and is behaving that way....She is waking in the night 4 to 5 times for about a week and so she is sleep deprived as am I....

I find being a mum so hard sometimes and just don't enjopy it with her when she is like this. I can of course deal with her being ill but the constant pushing and being soooooooo difficult is really getting to me. It affects my realshionship with my husband and leaves me with no energy for anyting else.

I would like another baby so my dd is not an only child but I am really beginning to question this as I don't know if I would cope or whether I am a good enough mum.

I so dearly wanted my dd but I just never thought it would be this hard. I love her so much but this stage is really hard....

Oh just feel so crappy today...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

WowOoo · 02/02/2008 19:58

I too was thinking I could ahve another and then he turned into the brat from hell(just today)!
Hope tomorrow is better for both of us!

talktothebees · 02/02/2008 19:59

everything is hard when you're not getting enough sleep. Can you give yourself a day or even an afternoon off? Is there anyone how can look after your DD while you just get a rest?

Winter is also harder - not so easy to just stick them in the pram and go for a walk when things get tough.

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 19:59

how old is he

OP posts:

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 20:00

I live 200 hundred miles away and have therefore have no family near by. She goes to nursery 2 days a week and I work one of those. My dh took her out today for 2 hours and I cleaned the windows but he said this evening that I have left him too it today and that we should share it

OP posts:

fordfiesta · 02/02/2008 20:02

ditto talktothebees..... as a mother of a chronic non-sleeper my mood and ability to cope go totally pear shaped when ds is poorly or sleeping particularily badly!!! Big hugs and sympathy but not much practical advice really!! sorry

DoodleToYou · 02/02/2008 20:04

Message withdrawn

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 20:05

just being able to talk and read the these things helps....

It's all so daunting....

OP posts:

clutteredup · 02/02/2008 20:06

Let your DH get up in the night tonight and then he might be a bit more understanding. After all its the weekend and its your turn for a rest.

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 20:21

he helps alot in the nights to be fair to him, but he feels that at weekends we should share it as he has a very demanding job and so is tired at weekends aswell

OP posts:

talktothebees · 02/02/2008 20:34

Well sharing it means one of you gets the saturday lie in and one the sunday. Or you get up both morning but get 3 hours each afternoon to yourself. And don't clean windows in your child-free time - sleep, read the paper, have a bath, watch crap telly and eat chocolate but NEVER do any housework.

What you do every day, looking after your DD, is work. Nannies and childminders get paid to do it. Just because you don;t get a salary for it doesn't make it any less work.

If you have no family nearby do you have a good circle of friends or do you go to any mum and toddler things?

calvemjoe · 02/02/2008 20:42

Also, number 2 tends to be a bit easier as they have to get use to waiting from an early age. You can't be in 2 places at once and number one sometimes has to come 1st.

Keep repeating 'it's just a phase, it's just a phase, it's just a phase, it's....'

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 21:05

talkofthe bees...good sound advice

I don't go to any groups as am quite shy and tried our local village one and they all seemed very clicky and clustered together chatting among themselves. I came away feeling even more isolated

OP posts:

talktothebees · 02/02/2008 21:14

ah well that's the trouble with all groups. I can feel excluded from a clique in a queue at a supermarket. Where in the country are you? Perhaps there's an MN meet-up near you? I hate going to mummy groups because I'm an unsociable cow and I resent having to make the effort to talk to strangers. It's like being on the pull again but without the thrill of potential sex

Divastrop · 02/02/2008 21:17

some mum+toddler groups can be like that.actually ,most of them are.is there a playgroup in your villiage?or a nursery nearby where your dd could go for a little while?it really helps them to mix with others at this age,and i have always found it easier to start random conversations in a playground/outside a nursery.then when you have got to know a couple of the other mums,toddler groups are less daunting and you become part of the clique

i found 2 children MUCH easier than having one.i find having 5 is easier than having one!

Original poster

madame · 02/02/2008 21:25

5 oh my god..........

dd awake again already not happy with mouth ulcers. Doesn't want me at all and just keeps crying for her Daddy.

Insult to injury....

OP posts:

talktothebees · 02/02/2008 21:35

where is daddy?

beckystaffs · 02/02/2008 21:40

hello madame,
i've had a chronic non sleeper in dd1 for about 2weeks. she is 3 & goes to bed at 7.30pm and is awake for at least an hour every night and then up at 4.30-5am. she is learning about wake up times- (looking out side at the window and seeing its still dark).
dd2 is opposite (they share a room, but even dd1 can't wake her).
Don't be put off by no1 about having another as others have said, i've found 2 some times easier than 1, they can entertain each other.
Get your ds outside, even for 10min, will make you both fell better honestly and helps them sleep after some fresh air. Plus gives you a little ray of energy after no sleep (break from 4 walls etc)

Original poster

madame · 03/02/2008 18:48

Terrible night last night but she seems to have turned a corner this afternoon and has eaton 4 rusks with milk.

I have my happy little girl back at the moment....

The nurofen may have something to do with it .

I should not try and make a decision about having our second when I am totally shattered....

Thanks for all your kind words

OP posts:

Original poster

madame · 03/02/2008 20:21

Brushing dd teeth tonight and her gums bled....this has never happened before. I am obsessive about cleaning her teeth and do it twice a day religously. I have noticed that for the last few days she has been reluctant to let me and I just put it down to the ulcers but tonight I insisted as her breath was beginning to smell and it had to be done. It was not the ulcers for sure as I didn't go near them but her teeth seemed really sensitive.....

OP posts:

Flip