My 19 month old and separation anxiety

[lilbooboo1]

So my DD has recently turned 19 months, she has always been very attached to me. I am the main parent day to day until her dad comes home after work. I thought this clingy behaviour was starting to get better but it's becoming so much worse. It's a strange one to explain because it's mainly when we are at home. If am at someone else's house or play centre she's fine and running off. If I'm at home it is impossible to get anything done because she wants me to sit down with her so she can twiddle my hair. It's becoming so bad that when I'm cooking tea she will just cry at my legs. Also she's no longer letting her dad bath her and get her ready for bed like she's always done. I work nights so the nights I'm not there she's absolutely fine and lets him bath her. She will even say bye to me when I'm leaving. It's as if she can't deal with not having me next to her or holding her if I'm in the room. It's so full on and I try to stay calm but I literally feel so touched out and drained from the constant attention she needs. I know I shouldn't but I even find my self thinking to my self "I need a drink, but I'll have to carry her/ she will cry at my feet" so I end up leaving it. It's not good for my mental health and I feel like I'm not my best self for her. 😞 her dad tries to help out but it's not worth it when she's in that clingy mood because she will just cry for ages. Everyone keeps saying it will get easier but it just feels never ending 😣

Hi Lil, my 19 month old dd is doing the exact same. I have a 7 month old ds so was thinking she is feeling jealous of him but my SIL told me her 18 month old ds is behaving similarly. I think it's too do with separation anxiety. My dd has become needy all of a sudden especially whilst at home. I can't do anything without her being stuck to me. It is tiring. I feel exactly the same as you. The only way I'm handling it right now is allowing my husband to take over with ds so I can deal with dd but I do feel everytime I give into her she is just expecting more and more attention. Its a vicious cycle. I'm hoping she grows out of it. Have you had any progress over the last few weeks since you originally posted?

Hey Floristdreamer, sorry it's taken so long to reply. I don't get notifications when someone's commented!

So my dd will be 23 months on the 4th April and from the time I posted last she has got a lot better. Don't get me wrong we still have our days when she won't leave my side but a lot less days like that. I do believe she has gotten past a "phase" and is becoming a little more independent. Also I just told myself that I couldn't keep given in all the time. I didn't want a nearly 2 year old to rule my life anymore 😣😂 so I did have days where I would let her cry at my legs and then I would go down to her level and try to explain that I would sit/hold her when I finished what I was doing. Eventually it has worked and she understands (most of the time). I can imagine it must be so much more stressful when you have another child as well, I feel for you!
That's one of the reasons I'm holding off having my second till a bit later down the line. My dd is very clingy and she always will be so I'm going to wait till she's old enough to understand me more 😂 I really hope things have gotten better for you x