Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Have just lost it big time with DD and could do with some advice

1 reply

Lazylou · 31/01/2008 15:10

DD (4) has been a proper little madam just lately, but I have put this down to a change in routine and the fact that I am pg again.

Over the past few weeks her behaviour has deteriorated to such an extent that I would be quite happy to send her to stay with relatives for a while, only I wouldn't wish her behaviour on them.

She is rude and destructive, smashing things up around the house, slamming doors so that pictures wobble and fall off the walls. Her bedroom is full of smashed up toys and clean clothes are strewn all over the place. She has drawn and written on the walls and picked paint off the walls. She smacks me, tells me she hates me and wants to 'deaded' me. She tells me she hates the baby and tries to smack my bump. She kicks she pinches and she is just downright horrible.

She gets me to boiling point so the next thing I know I am screaming at her to get in her room, so I can have a break from her. She throws tantrums the like I have never seen and I work with kids on a daily basis. The house is in such a terrible state because she gets stuff out all over the place. I expect her to put things away before getting other stuff out (she's 4 and I know she is capable of doing it) but she says she can't, she's too busy, it's too heavy. I have threatened to throw it all in the bin because I am sick to death of looking at it.

I have tried naughty steps, putting her in her room, ignoring her all to no avail. We are now resorting to stopping treats, such as pudding, sweets, visits to nanny.

At the moment she is in her bedroom and is kicking the walls and screaming. She used to be such a loving little girl but is now horrible and I'm running out of patience with her. I don't want to be around her at the moment and I feel terrible for saying that, because at the end of the day, she's my baby.

I don't know what to do and none of the tried and tested behavioural methods I have learnt at work are working. Believe me, I have tried everyone in the book.

Dh works long hours and isn't always here to deal with the fall out although he did concede yesterday that I needed a break from her. As he is the only one working at the moment, I'm stuck with her whilst he is out til all hours. I know I am going to lose my temper with her properly and smack her, I just know it. I really don't want to do it but believe me, it is taking every ounce of strength I have not to go in there and let her have it. I know I sound like a terrible mother and I know it's a stage, but I can't go on much longer like this.

Sorry this is so long, but I do feel a tad better for getting it all out in the open.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Bellavita · 31/01/2008 15:37

You are not terrible. The things I feel sometimes with DS2 (8) are really horrible. He can destruct for England if he is in that sort of mood, so I really feel for you.

Problem with me & DS2 is we are both very stubborn which does not help the situation in fact it really inflates it.

Sometimes I just shut myself in another room for a breather.

The behaviour can be really draining.

I don't have any advice for you - if I did I would use it on DS2, just that you are not on your own.

Hugs to you.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page