So today my children made me cry...

[Mummyto4x]

So today I sat and cried in front of my children. After multiple times explaining to them to stop jumping in the furniture, to stop hitting eachother. To quiet down because their dad was asleep after a 10 hour night shift. I explained to my 3 year old to please leave the kitten to sleep, she then got in a fit of temper and was being to rough with the cat. So I calmly removed her from the situation and sat her on the sofa for some quiet time and she then got up and grabbed the kitten really hard. I lost of temper. I shouted so many times today after asking all my kids nicely to behave. They just laughed at me and told me I'm mean and that I'm selfish (I had my breakfast after them and it was one small pot noodle) they have reindeer asda crumpets. I'm just sick of being called a mean mum because I have something different to them. And I'm sick of not being listened too. I don't know why I've even written this. I guess I just needed some adults to speak to. I have no friends. No family. And my partner is either working or sleeping. Guessing I'm just fed up of only speaking to 4 children who just never listen or are constantly arguing with eachother or me. So yes I pretty much cried and they've settled down. I shouldn't need to be made to cry before I'm listened too :(

Oh poor you, you sound exhausted.

How old are the DC?

Can you get them all outside for an autumn walk to tire them out, then home for hot chocolate or something?
When my DC were young I found they needed to be outside for part of every day.

Would it help you to have a fixed structure to each non school day so you can preplan activities and quiet times to stop them getting up to mischief?

Go hard line on manners with sticker charts for good behaviour and mini prizes?

(Also, is having a kitten really a good idea right now? Can the kitten be kept more separate for the children at all?)

I think you need to rehome the pets, it's very unfair for them to be treated badly by the children as they are right now and it would be one less thing for you to have to worry about.

Telling children to behave nicely is not going to do anything, how much time do you spend doing things with them? Boredom creates badly behaved children and the more time you keep them busy the less time they have to be causing trouble. Also the more you do with them the more likely they are to want to please you. Take them out for a walk, to the library, play some games, have a routine every weekend so they don't just have endless hours of nothing much to do. I was a bloody nightmare as a child when I was bored and wound my brother up no end. It's one of the main reasons i only had one child.

Just to clarify in my post I never mentioned my children hurting my kitten. I mentioned my 3 year would not leave the kitten alone and being a little rough. The was being a little to rough with the cuddling. My kids love our family pet and so do I. My children have never hurt our kitten since the moment we got our kitten around 3 months ago. I just mentioned my three year old being to rough but should of mentioned with the cuddling. Not physically hurting him. Hes is very much loved in my home by me, my partner and all my children. I'm assuming it's why my three year old wants to be around him all the time. Hes not scared if them, nor hisses or growls. In fact all he does is purr when shes near him but I'm also teaching her not to cuddle him to hard.

My children are 7,6,5 and 3. I have three girls and one boy.

I do alot with them. They all go to different after school clubs though out the week. At weekends we go to the park, play in the garden, watch movies, play with arts and crafts. I do have a day where we just sit in and watch tv because there are days I need just to be able to tidy up and sit down and they are our bad days. Like today. I've had to wait for deliveries all day for christmas and food shopping. I've also decided its tidy up day. Which my children have a problem with. But through out the week, weekend and holidays were always busy out and about exploring. Maybe that's my problem. Maybe there so used to going out of the house that when we are home they hate it. Guess it's my fault. Because sometimes I need a break and a rest or a lazy day

I think if they are used to doing a lot (which sounds fab) then a whole day at home is going to be hard.
It might just need to be like that for you, I don't know.

However it might be better if you were able to sandwich the boring stuff between other things so: 'right we're going to tidy downstairs, and then if there is time we'll go to the park before lunch. Everyone find 10 things and put them where they belong.'

I read here about a fab method one Mum used. Every child has a bag designated to a room and they follow Mum around as she tidies. Mum picks up item and gives it to the right child (eg kitchen child, playroom child etc). Swarm around the house picking up the misplaced items, then go to each room in turn and empty the bags putting things away.

I didn't think the kitten was being harmed, it just sounded like more work for you.

You sound like you're doing brilliantly generally, just having a bad day.

I really appreciate the advice. I will try to do that more often. I guess I just find it very hard to get them all to do different things with them being so close to age they always want to do the same thing. For instance they will argue over who picks up the toys or put rubbish on the bin. My three year old kind of overpowers everything because sometimes it's easier just giving up and not risking an argument. But I understand what you mean and will definitely try that advice. Thank you x

And no I didnt mean you making the comment about the kitten. You are completely correct, maybe I should of waited until my three year old was a little older. But I guess it's to late now I just love him to much to let him go. I'd never let him get hurt. Nor my children with the kitten if that makes sense. He has his own time when there in bed and he will just play and lounge on me in bed x

Once again thank you for your advice. I'm definitely going to try it on out lazy indoor days. I've taken them to the park and now home making them cheesy pasta bake so their currently watching Netflix together nicely. So maybe it did work. Fingers crossed

Glad you are feeling a bit better. I have no idea how I'd cope with 4!!