can you reassure us? 14 mth old dd won't be left with dh

[lilysma]

Can anyone reassure us that this is a stage that will pass? Is there anything we can do to deal with it positively?

DD is looked after by me 2 days a week and jointly at the weekend. She's still breastfed and recently has really upped the ante on this, wanting to be on the breast more often and for longer than usual. I'm guessing it's a growth spurt or a new developmental stage is going on. Anyway at the same time she cries inconsolably whenever I leave her with her dad - whether or not I'm in the house - e.g. showering - or out - e.g. not back from work yet. She's fine with him if he takes her out and about, and seems fine at nursery. He's finding it very upsetting. At the moment we just try to keep these times short, but sometimes she just can't have me and dh wants to spend time with her. How can I reassure him and get this phase to pass as quickly as possible?

my dd was like this at aroung 11 months ish. i acutally had to come back from a slimming world meeting because she was screaming for me so much!
just wanted to let you know it does pass.

even now, she is 2.2 she still hates me leaving her,and will still have a cry if i leave her with her dad, but found it improved the more time he spent with her, and as she got older, he could distract her more with toys, tv, anything really, just take her mind off my leaving.

My dd was the same. Afraid I just used to be brutal and leave them to get on with it. Ds, when he got that age, couldn't care less.

yes we had this and it did pass

don't worry too much - ds is now in love with dp as Daddy things are so much more fun than dull old Mummy things - he has felt this way since about 3 I would say, but they were ok to be left together before then, can't remember dates exactly

my ds is also 14 mo and at the moment being very clingy to me - not to the extent of your dd but he certainly doesn't want daddy to comfort him at night etc.. and would always rather come to me. We figure its just a stage, and i remember reading somewhere that when a child is like this with one parent, its important for the other one to not get too disheartened because this just reinforces the child's feeling that only the "preferred" parent can deal with them. So my dh is trying hard to be friendly, fun and upbeat with him even when its not reciprocated. Does that make sense?! Anyways, hope it improves!

Thanks for all your messages, Am trying to encourage dh to hang on in there with the smiles and be matoor, but easy for me to say I know!