Extremely angry 8 yo. Where to turn for help?

[Veryangryboy]

I have an 8 year old son who has frequent violent meltdowns. He will scream horrible things at me/DH like he wants us to die, will kill us, we're horrible, stupid etc. Sometimes he says he wants to die which is heartbreaking. He breaks things; sometimes his own toys or schoolwork, sometimes our things. He has caused a lot of damage to our house. He is physically violent to us, hitting kicking, throwing things at us. This even happens while I'm driving.

This is happening almost daily, sometimes more than once a day.

Apparently his behaviour at school is fine.

Sorry for the long post. What I'm looking for is advice on where to get help for my son. The GP has said there is nothing she can do as CAMHS waiting list is too long there is no point referring.

GP did refer for an ADHD assessment a couple of years ago, but as his behaviour is ok at school he was not assessed.

I can't really afford private healthcare but I think it's the only option now. Can anyone advise who i should take him to please? Counseling? Play therapy? A psychiatrist? I don't know where to start.

Just to add, the cause of the meltdowns is always something trivial like it's time for bed, time for dinner, time to do homework etc and he doesn't want to stop what he's doing.

Losing a game, or his favourite football team losing a game are also triggers.

No advice OP but my DS is exactly. the same.

Just this morning he punched me in the stomach (not hard but still) because he didn't want to brush his teeth. He has SEN and is behind at school but no other diagnosis. We've just been rereferred to the community paeds.

You have my full sympathy, you're not alone and it's not just you!

Thanks for your reply and sorry to hear you and your ds are going through this too. It is good to know it's not just me. Hope your referral is helpful .

Today he attacked me while I was driving, because I didn't hear what he said and asked him to repeat. Then he threatened to jump out of a 3rd floor window when we got home.

Have requested an appointment with a private child psychiatrist, hopefully it's a step towards getting him some help.

That sounds a good start. You can also refer yourself to social services early help which does seem to be a bit if a lottery but can help speed things up.

I would put some cheap cameras in the house and one in your car (dash cam) because you need to build up evidence, and footage can make a hell of a difference.
I am sorry OP, I hope you manage to get help soon

OP did you get anywhere for your son? I could have wrote this word for word