I have two boys, one nearly 5 the other 18mos older: 6.5ish. They are really good buddies, partners in crime etc. (That's a topic for a separate post.) They are each a delight one on one. However, dealing with the pair can lead me to pulling my hair out. They get physical with each other multiple times a day on the weekends.
TBF it's mostly the 4yo - he's far more physical. I think 6yo would happily not do it anywhere near as much. It's like it builds up in him and has to be released. He'll just go and, e.g. lean against 6yo on the sofa, 6yo whines and pushes him away, and they're off! And then maybe someone gets hurt and cries, maybe I shout, maybe I manage to redirect them, but:
As an only child and (obvs) a girl child, this was not on my childhood radar. I didn't have to fight anyone in my own house! DH (and society) is sending me the message that this is normal, inevitable, although he has taken on board after a recent discussion how distressing and stressful I find it to live in a house where this is going on, and I am feeling like I need, like a UN peacekeeper, to constantly monitor the potential warzone! So we're going to try to come down harder on it, but does anyone have any perspective, tips, tactics, book recommendations, sympathy?!
NB They do martial arts classes because I hoped it would give them skills/rules to their fighting. Not so far (12 months in). Neither have come home with any messages from school that they act like this there, so it seems to simply be we have ended up sending the message that this is ok at home (when it isn't, but all attempts so far have failed).