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Desperate - need help with violent "flip outs"

1 reply

Laureneacooke · 12/10/2022 09:19

I'm desperately seeking help as it feels like our family is at breaking point.

My 4.5 yo boy, Cal, has always struggled with big emotions, and at the moment in particular he gets what we call "fizzy" - where he starts feeling het up and over the top, often without any obvious trigger. This often escalates to him suddenly (apropos of nothing) trying to hit, bite, kick and headbut me and his sister, often whilst laughing hysterically.

I try and handle this (on a good day) by hiding his wrists so he can't hurt us, explaining that his brain has gone fizzy but it's not ok to hit, and eventually getting him to do deep breaths at which point he calms down. Can take anything from 2 mins to 15.

On a not good day, I end up throwing him in his room (sometimes literally) or barricading myself in a safe space, or shouting at him, and a few times all I've wanted to do is hit him. I hate it, and I hate that I want to behave this way but after being hit enough I feel the red mist descend.

I'm after some coping strategies (for me and him) as this can't go on. I need to help him work through it, and I need to be a parent that doesn't just set us on on a vicious cycle of making it work.

I'm exhausted, and I'm sad, and I really need help

OP posts:
Laureneacooke · 12/10/2022 09:21

*holding his wrists

P.s. I know holding them probably isn't nice by itself but I don't know how else to keep us safe

OP posts:
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