Appropriate response to "I want my Daddy"

[TiddlerTiddler]

Really struggling with DS1. Everytime I ask him to do anything he doesn't want to do (eg. cooperate when getting dressed), or tell him off for something naughty, his response is "I want my Daddy".

I know it sounds stupid, but I am at the end of my rope with this. Its constant and incredible wearing.

I try to ignore it, but more and more frequently my response is to want to say Shut up (but end up saying Stop It) or cry.

I should add that my coping skills are zero at the moment due to PND (mild) brought on by amongst other things an non sleeping 6 month old. I know I should laugh it off, but my sense of humour seems to have gone AWOL these days

Although, DS1 is very affectionate towards his little brother I guess he is put out / threatened on some level and punishing me this way.

And the way responsibilities have split since DS2 arrival has been DH looking after DS1 when DH is around (at weekends only). He is quite soft with him, so then I am the horrible strict one during the week trying to get him to stop bouncing on the bed, to get him dressed, fed, out AND wearing a coat/hat etc.

The problem is that it is starting to affect my feelings towards DS1, which I am shocked by. I know I still love him, but at times right now I don't like him very much.

How about 'I wish DH was here too. It's always more fun when we are all together as a family.'

That way you show empathy and that you are 'on his side'.

Plus don't bother with the coat and hat. Stick them in a bag or under the pushchair and let him ask for them when he gets cold.

this is way to get a reaction from you as you say you look after one and dh looks after the other how about when this is happening dh looks after baby for an hr and you tell ds1 that you are having special time with mummy

and when he says i want daddy say me too but how about we spend special time together untill daddy gets home

dc do sence things around parents and maybe can feel your not feeling 100% so try as best you can to make tiime fun and not stress yourself out to much

easier said than done i know i too had pnd but did find laughter best to making me feel brigfhter had to stop myself every time i felt the anger rise

so took ds into other room and just done silly things and found he soon relaxed around me

They are all good points! Thanks. I have asked DH to mind DS2 this saturday and DS1 and I are going to go and do something special.

I know, putting myself in his shoes, I am sure he feels elbowed aside when the baby arrives.

hope you both have good day it will mean alot to him i'm sure its got to be hard as newborn is demanding on its own without needing to keep toddler feeling secure and demanding also

let us know how it goes for you both x

I'm with otherside, if DS says to me 'I want my Daddy' I say 'Me too, lets go and do * quickly then he'll be home'.

Also agree no coat and hat, dont agree with a child, there is no need, if he doesnt want to wear a coat, say fine, and put it in your bag, if he doesnt want to get dressed fine, take him out in his pjs, he'll soon realise you're saying these things for a reason.

*argue! not agree.
Just if you do have to go out with him in pjs go an hour earlier, it's likely as soon as you get five minutes downt he road he'll want to go home and get changed.

Yep - I'm listening... don't argue. I think that would save a lot of stress all around!

And I love that PJs suggestion! It would save a lot of tears and explain WHY we need to get dressed in the morning!!!

Just reading this thread now and hoping you had a good time on Sat, let us know if you have time.

oh I see, it is this coming Sat. sorry! have fun!