Desperate help needed

[missanon1612]

I am in desperate need of help.

I have a 5 year old who can be the sweetest girl but then all of a sudden change into the most whiniest, clingy, angriest little one!

She is really attached to me to the point that if I need to leave the house I have to sneak out the back door because if she realises I’m going she will kick off. I cannot go out without her without constant messages asking when I am coming home. If it’s late she will not go to sleep until I am home which means nights out are a no.

She also loses it at the drop of a hat! For instance if I stroke the dog and pay attention to the dog she gets angry and says I am paying more attention to the dog than her. She goes crazy and says she so mad if she doesn’t get her way.

She is an extremely fussy eater (cucumber and plain pasta only) and bedtime / sleep is just another battle I face.

I feel like I’m drowning and failing her. She will not let her daddy do anything to help and can often be quite spiteful to him despite him never doing anything to warrant this.

We don’t have a health visitor anymore due to her age and the GP doesn’t want to know.

I am at my wits end. I would go private but wouldn’t know where to start.

I have tried every technique, tip, routine going to try and sort out the issues but nothing is helping.

Does anyone know where I start or the best person to contact?

I feel like I’m failing her and raising an unhappy child

I cannot go out without her without constant messages asking when I am coming home.

I'm a bit baffled by this one. How is she messaging you @missanon1612?

I am at my wits end. I would go private but wouldn’t know where to start

What would you like her assessed for OP? Have you spoken to the school to see if they can help?

Hi,
i am so very sorry to hear this. It sounds really tough and i feel for you. I am a single mum and have had ups and downs with my daughter over the years like this. I have been lucky enough to have some classes and parenting advice from top psychologists that’s really helped me.
i am going to assume that there is nothing developmentally amiss etc and that your home is generally a loving typical home.
In which case a lot can be eased by parenting techniques and calm boundaries. You are both the parents, she is only 5. Read as much as you can - there’s a great instagram account called ParentsTogether that has amaZing tips for dealing with outbursts and initiating great conversations.
what does your daughter love doing with you?
mine loved to play with her dolls and toys on the floor with me. She preferred this to going out, walks, playground etc. although we often did these other things, playing on her terms really helped her feel secure. Often parents only give attention to their children when they’re playing up, screaming or yelling. Try walking over when they’re olaying quietly and asking if you can join in at some point. Reward their good behaviour.
Hand in hand with this focused attention, has to come calm firm boundaries. Explain that you play with her in the day at the weekend, and then sometimes you will need to go out but you love her and are always coming back. Loop your husband into the play, let him do some things his way maybe. Watch Peppa Pig with her, don’t half watch your phone; eat together some key times a week and talk to her at the table.
Don’t be afraid of her and don’t be afraid to read up on ideas and tips all the time - we don’t always know what to do.
wish you lots of luck x