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My 4 year old is burning me out

2 replies

Twitchett22 · 18/08/2022 19:40

My 4 year olds behaviour is absolutely wearing me out to the point of me crying most nights when she’s in bed.
She refuses to listen to me, she is constantly noisy with ridiculous noises just running round the house shouting. I take things away from her and she screams in my face but I remain consistent with it. She is constantly fighting for attention when I’m attending to her younger sister. Throughout the summer holidays her sister has been in nursery a couple of days a week so I’ve made sure we’ve had a ‘special mummy daughter day’ when it’s just us two but even some of those she had ruined with her behaviour whilst we’ve been out.
In the last year I have split up with her dad and moved into a new house, she seems to have taken it in her stride up to now but maybe this is what the problem is? I give her as much attention as I can but obviously my younger one also needs me and I’m finding it very difficult to split myself.
I feel like all I do is shout at her and lose my temper and I’m at my wits end with what to do.
Any ideas would be appreciated please because I feel like the worst mum in the world right now 😩

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mrslees1 · 24/08/2022 16:38

I don't have any major advice or tips but I am currently experiencing the same with my son who is the same age, most days we both end up in tears and I am struggling to manage him
We have some changes coming up, me and his dad aren't together and I am getting married in December. I think this is about gaining control I am finding it hard to enjoy days out with him and turn down invites to visit friends and family in case he plays up. Lack of school routine doesn't help either!
He will throw things at me, scream in my face, and has hit and kicked me
I've recently started the time out step and if he is acting out I warn him. If he continues I take him to the step and calmly tell him he has 4 mins time out and then he has to stay there. Even if he walks away I put him back calmly as I can until he does the 4 mins. So far this has definitely helped and I've called or his calm down space to avoid the punishment aspect. Not sure if this is something you'd try but thought I'd share as a fellow mom who cries herself to sleep most nights wondering what the hell to do!
Lots of love x

Twitchett22 · 24/08/2022 17:07

That’s very helpful thank you! It’s exhausting isn’t it and I’m so conscious that the life decisions I have made e.g leaving her dad are causing so many problems for her, makes me feel like such a failure. Fingers crossed it will pass for us both x

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