Worried about Autism for 17 month old

[Kwno1]

Hi everyone.

I'm currently driving myself insane constantly analysing my gorgeous little boy and i feel so bad for it. It started off because I noticed he only says mama and dada and nothing else no matter how hard I try and obviously I started googling and Google said Autism! If I list a few things he does and doesn't do can someone tell me if I'm mad or not before I contact the HV. My partner keeps telling me I'm being stupid and maybe I am but I would like some outside input.

Normal traits:

Says mama & dada in context
Does point but mainly for things he wants like food. Sometimes he points at new people we meet and smiles at them.
When he smiles he makes eye contact with myself, his dad and others, even strangers.
He eats well
Sleeps well
Hes been walking since 13 months and has good motor skills - can hold a spoon etc
He climbs the furniture
He doesnt mind loud noises
He does show an interest in other children but it's fleeting. I would say parallel play atm.
He brings me/ shows toys
Opens books and turns pages (occasionally points when looking at them)
Hes not interested in spinning things like wheels on a car but doesn't play with cars how you should. He just carries them around and inspects them.

Possible ASD traits:

Won't respond to his name at all, usually in home setting. It's like he doesn't hear me but when I say 'biscuit', he turns around instantly.
He will very rarely will follow a command, maybe twice a week.
He doesn't look at me when he's eating dinner or any other time other than when he's smiling or we are playing chase or I'm singing nursery rhymes.
Doesn't follow my point
Sometimes walks tippy toes but I would say 5% of the day.
He spins in circles but only for a few seconds, maybe 3 times a day. It seems like a game.

Other notes:
When he's playing outside he usually just wants to hold things in both hands walk around with them, for example stones or sticks.
Sometimes he laughs to himself but not often.
Hes generally indifferent to me and his dad leaving the room but does get excited when we return.

That's pretty much everything I can think of.

Hopefully I am just being silly and the things I'm worried about are just a 17 month old being a 17 month old!

It sounds like he's developing well, at 17 months old children aren't skilled at following commands so that's not unusual and could come with time.

Does he go to nursery or a childcare setting? Often children change when they do attend one and lose the interest in solitary play and pay more attention to others around them. If that's not for you, maybe toddler groups would suit him or play dates with other children around his age if possible.

There's no alarming signs there, and at 17 months old it's difficult to tell if it's early ASD or just children developing!

I suppose it is hard to tell at this age but I'm about to have a c section on Wednesday so I'm worried he won't get the attention he needs or I'll miss other signs whilst caring for my newborn.

No he doesn't go to nursery but we do meet up with other children maybe once or twice a week. I think I'll have to dedicate some time going to a toddler group to socialise him a bit more. Maybe that's something he's lacking, although he'll have a little brother soon to play with.

I really appreciate your reply ♡

Good luck for Wednesday!!

You'll probably spend more time with your son than you think and seeing how he reacts to a new baby will be important too. Try not to worry about it, there's nothing you need to be doing differently just support him as you do already. If anything changes, or indeed doesn't, and you notice he's not developing as expected to speak to a GP or even mention it to your baby's HV.

As they're so close in age you might be able to take them to baby&toddler groups together, or try to set some time aside to take them individually. But really don't stress about it, he's happy and healthy and very well looked after x

I agree that overall, it sounds like he's developing well. With things like name response, if you've been calling his name to test this, children are quite good at working out that you're calling them 'for no reason' (from their perspective), and thus tuning you out. It's also normal for children of this age not to respond to their name if they are engrossed in something else. They can't pay attention to multiple things at once the way an older child or adult can, so it's like they don't hear you.

With commands, I always think you have to separate how out a child responds to instructions he's likely to want to follow ('come have a snack', 'let's go to the park', etc.) and ones he probably isn't so keen on ('give me that [interesting thing you aren't supposed to be touching!]', 'no', etc.). The first type is about understanding; the second requires understanding, yes, but mood, personality, etc. come into it a lot more. There are plenty of developmentally fine but strong-willed personalities out there who very seldom complied with the second sort of instruction as toddlers!

I too have similar concerns about my own 17month old.. I know this is a couple of months old but was just wondering if you had an update on your little one?

Hi there !

Continuing Concerns -

so he's 22 months now and still not saying anything other than mama and dada. However, I go through the alphabet song with him and he tries to make the noises for 'e' 'i' and 'p'. He now meows and makes a monkey noise and within the last few days 'uh oh' but not in context.

He still doesn't make much eye contact when eating but all other times are OKand he now cuddles and kisses on request !

Responds to his name maybe 5 out of 10 times

Improvements -

Stopped spinning
Makes eye contact a normal amount
Shares enjoyment
Brings me toys like his tunnel so I can open it
Today his slipper came off and he brought it to me and held his foot up for me to put it on and when I was changing his nappy he tried to put his slipper on!
He does follow commands but only when it benefits him.

The main concern is his language. To be honest because he's improved in all those ways I feel like it's less autism and maybe more of a speech/language delay. My HV said we wouldn't revisit until he is 2.4 years, so I will update again at that point.

Ah thank you for your update I’m so glad to hear he has improved in so many areas :) I’m hoping as time goes on my little one will be the same. May I ask when you started to see the improvements or what you did to get there?

@Carrieonmywaywardsun @Helpmepleas @Lacedwithgrace @skkyelark Thank you for all your messages. Here's a little update.

My LB had his 2 year review (he's now 26 months and he pretty much failed it. He failed mainly on communication and social but was good in fine motor skills. He's going to have his hearing and eyes tested before we consider getting him referred but the HV wants to come back in a month to check on his development.

His language has certainly improved in some ways - he now has 50 words and has on occasion (about 3 occassions), put 2 words together such as 'mama banana' when reaching for a banana and 'bubbles mama' when wanting me to blow more bubbles. However, he is not using any other words he has learnt to try and communicate.

As for eye contact, he is making more but still won't look at me when he's eating.

One thing that has been and gone is side eyeing. He did this for a couple of weeks but now has stopped. Another thing that's gone is clapping. He used to clap and now doesn't but never used to point and now does. It's all very confusing for me !

Something that has popped up is hand movements. It's hard to explain and I've watched many kids stim online and I can't find anything similar, but he waves his arms and hands about a little bit like a Ln orchestra conductor - usually when he's in his highchairs or just chatting to himself. He does look at his hands alot throughout the day when he's not playing with his toys.

I'm still hoping he's not on the spectrum, I just want him to be happy and healthy. I'm just trying to model language to him every day and hopefully he picks it up. I've had sleepless nights and days where I've not eaten because I've felt so worried ! Any thoughts or input would be greatly appreciated.

Hi there I’ve been following your thread, do you have any more updates? Everything you have described is exactly the same as my 17 month old x

Hi Amy,

So my LB is now 32months and has improved in some ways and not in others. His word count has improved, but his expressive language is non existent.

He can say hundreds of words, but only to label things. For example if I point to stuff in a book he can tell me what it is, however, there is very little attempt at back and forth communication.

Only recently he's been telling me he's hungry and will ask for water, but that's it.

The other area that is is struggling in is social communication - especially with other children (and his little brother). He usually ignores/avoids kids.

Because of these issues, he's been put forward for an Autism referral. We are also getting help from an organisation within the NHS called portage. They help kids with additional needs who aren't yet in an educational setting. They also have free groups to attend to get the kids ready for nursery/school.

If your child is having language difficulties, one of the tips they gave me was to start with their joint attention... so when you sing a song or nursery rhyme... hold out the last word to give your child a chance to say it. If they don't, you can say it, but this is something that has definitely got my LB joining in more. I do it with everything, even if he's building blocks ill sing ' wobbly wobbly, wobbly wobbly, they all fall........DOWN. thennill do it again and wait for him to say. I hope this helps you. I know how worrying it is.

@Kwno1 , how was he previously with other kids? You said he mostly ignores them, is that a new thing or he has always been like that, even at 17 months? You mentioned then that he was parallel playing.

i don’t understand , why is his expressive language bad, if he says mama banana, if he wants you to give him banana? Maybe it’s not developed but it looks like he is expressive.

He did smile at other babies up until he was about 9 months, maybe slightly older, but since he just ignores or avoids them. He's happy to play along side them, but he won't look them in the eye if they approach him or talk to him. For example, if we go to the park, the other children will run together to the slide and play on the apparatus, but my son will more more interested in the drain cover on the floor, or running his hands along the barred fence than play with the kids.

Yeah I agree, he can be expressive but it's very very limited. When I say he asks for a banana, he has probably done that a handful of times in 6 months. I think it's there and it will come out eventually - because he can talk because he mimics alot of what he sees and hears on TV or in books - but none of it is really from us. We are really having to work hard to get this stuff out of him.

I do believe he's on the spectrum, I mean we wouldn't have gotten this far with the help we have if he didn't have his problems, but I'm crossing my fingers that whatever needs he has won't affect his life too much in the future.

Hi
going though the same thing with my dd
any improvements? ☺️