20 month olds hates nappy change

[MuMu1]

Hi,
I’m new to the group and a FTM.
My 20 month olds hate having their nappy changed and wondered if anyone else’s toddler went through this? One isn’t so bad but clamps her legs shut completely making her difficult to clean. She is normally fine afterwards. My other toddler however screams blue murder and is very distressed. I’m surprised my neighbour hasn’t called the police she’s so distressed. She does the whole back arching and exorcist moves and I worry about her banging her head.

We have tried various methods to distract them, different toys, singing, putting on their favourite TV show but to no avail.
It has been going on for a month or two but has been progressively worse. The nursery manager has flagged it and said it’s not normal for them to behave like this at nappy change and at this age.

I appreciate at this age they can’t communicate too well other than their dislike to having a nappy change.

Has anyone had this? Any tips? Or just ride the wave?

One of my friends children did this - have you tried letting them change it ‘themselves’ (obviously with a little help).
The toddler I knew had input into their own changing and it made a world of difference as they were able to ‘control’ to an extent what was happening

No I haven’t tried but will attempt to give it a go. They’re not the best with instructions. The moment they see anything nappy changing related they make a run for it. They’re not that great with their level of understanding at the minute either but I’ll give anything a go thank you for your response x

this may not help but I’ve started letting my dd do some bits herself as the previous poster mentioned, for example, putting it in the bin after. She seems to have got a bit more ‘compliant’ since we did this, i think because she knows she gets to do the ‘fun’ thing of putting something in the usually-forbidden bin 😂😂. Give it a try, I had to show her the first few times as I didnt think she’d understand but she picked it up super quick, now I just hand it to her and say bin once we are done and off she goes! It’s true, I do think they like having some control in tasks

19 month is terrible at nappy changed always has been since she could move. I agree about getting them involved it definitely helps, I ask her to get her changing mat out and let her pull a few wipes out for me. Then ask her to put the nappy in the bin after. Works maybe 60% of the time, if all else fails and it’s a messy one, coco melon, dummy, pin her down and get it done quick .Big cuddles for after. I’m surprised the nursery manager says it’s unusual, I thought it was quite common for them to hate it at this age.

Have you tried changing them standing up, at least for nappies that are only wet? I've known a couple of people who found that helped reducing the fighting it, although not tried it myself.

Thank you for your responses. I’ve tried to engage her helping get the bits but the moment she sees it she runs away because she knows what’s coming. I’m going to try and get some small nappies for her to change on her doll as I’m hoping some role play might help.
I do change them whilst standing when it’s pull ups and it’s only wee when they’re like 1cm away from the TV screen!! But if it’s a poo I have to do it lying down.
Thank you again for your responses