I think my son lacks empathy

[paul2louise]

My son aged 11 is a calm friendly boy. He isn't aggressive. He is pretty laid back. We lost his nanna (dad's mum) 2 years ago. We lost our cat 2 years ago. This week we lost my stepdad. He doesn't get upset. He says he doesn't feel sad. I have brought him up a Catholic. He says he doesn't believe in God or Jesus anymore. He has done some PHSE classes at school and he tells me that any scenarios they ask him about he usually reacts by being not bothered.

He is sitting his Sats next week. He isn't really bothered about them. He wants a good mark but isn't slightest bit nervous about them.

I am just concerned that his move to secondary is a big chapter in his life. I want to make sure that he is ready for the next step. I worry about his future relationships and friendships. He has friends but no real close friends. Is there anything I can do to look into this more. He growing into a young man and I want him to develop in all ways not just academically, but emotionally and he will be changing hormonally too.

Thank you

Firstly, I'd ask MNHQ to move this over to the Preteens Section.

I think it's common for DC to question faith at this age. I was brought up going to Chapel x times a week but by 11 was firmly agnostic.

I'd talk to his teacher about your concerns regarding his empathy abs friendships, although it's not unusual not to have a best friend at this age.

I suppose you're already modelling good empathetic skills and talking to him about how others feel?

His teacher at parents evening zoom said he plays with nice group of friends and he had no concerns about that. But it's just when DS says things like Mr H asks me about this and that and I say I am not bothered. I think after his Sats I might email teacher and ask if he has any concerns about it and any advice. I think because he rarely gets into any trouble at school and is calm he wouldn't really flag anything up. But it's this lack of emotion that sort of bothers me.