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DC made racist statement

3 replies

HorrifiedHenry · 05/05/2022 18:35

Issue has come up at my DCs pre school today that has left me totally horrified and upset. I could really use some advice and perspective of others.

Essentially DCs keyworker has told me that she offered to take DC out in to the playground, DC declined and when she asked why DC stated ‘because I don’t like the colour of your skin’.

DC is white and keyworker is black. I’ve apologised to DCs keyworker although probably not profusely enough thinking about it because I was so totally dumbstruck. Understandably she asked if DC might have heard something like that at home which I’ve said no. We’re a family with a really diverse friendship group and there is nobody in our circle who DC would have heard that from. Where we live is also very diverse aswell so it’s not like DC has exposure to only white kids or to anything remotely racist or discriminatory. Older DC is in school and diversity is woven into all parts of the schools ethos too so we have conversations at home about inclusion and cultural awareness.

Keyworker has said she’s not offended but was concerned about how specific the statement was. She’s also said she’ll do some diversity and inclusion work with DC which I fully support.

I’m planning to take keyworker some flowers by way of a proper apology because I think it must have been horrible for her to hear that. I know kids come out with all sorts but this just feels really awful. DC is 4.5 so not like a toddler-when we got in I asked what was said and DC came out with the same statement verbatim. Said they haven’t heard from anyone else or on tv or tablet or anything. I did press a bit more and all DC could say about keyworker was ‘her skin is just different from my skin’
We’ve had a conversation about it all and I’ve reaffirmed what we’ve already said to both DCs about how we treat people and racism, but I’m just shocked to be honest

Where do I go from here???

OP posts:
HorrifiedHenry · 05/05/2022 20:41

Anyone?

OP posts:
BlueChampagne · 09/05/2022 12:53

Firstly I feel for you! You could ask your DC how they would feel if someone wouldn't play with them because of the colour of their skin/hair/eyes. Hopefully you'll get some empathy. You could also ask if they can talk you through the age-appropriate diversity and inclusion work, so you can support from home.

Mamachats · 23/05/2022 04:08

Sorry to hear this! It might be worth looking through the books you read too - diversifying your bookshelf could be a good place to start to have these conversations if you haven’t already. There’s lots of resources out there to talk about race and racism with children so this might be a good place to spark some discussions? I’d recommend My Skin, Your Skin

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