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Any other parents of ASD feel constant guilt around cause?

2 replies

ahna68 · 17/04/2022 12:08

DD1 (turns 3 this summer) had a dramatic skills regression around 20 months and is now clear that she is autistic. Pre regression plenty of interaction, speaking, interest in other kids (including DD2 who was a baby at the time) and since, a completely different toddler.

After finding it initially super hard to get my head around, especially in the early days of spotting the regression (for the period when others tried to explain it away) I am now very much used to the situation, although there are still many days where it feels very hard.

Lately though, and I know it’s not helpful, I have become fixated on what could have caused the regression. For example we moved abroad a few months prior and she started daycare around the time of the regression - I worry the less familiar language contributed to shutting herself into a bubble. She also had a terrible sickness bug around the same time which at the time I did feel she never bounced back from. I know that logically if she was going to be ASD it would have presented at some point or other but I still can’t help but think about it all, especially as DD2 approaches a similar age. Does anyone else struggle with these types of thinking patterns?

OP posts:
SuperSleepyBaby · 17/04/2022 14:55

I did for a few years after my son was diagnosed. It faded away and now i wish i hadn’t wasted my time feeling guilty and sad about it.

Would counselling help?

ahna68 · 18/04/2022 20:20

@SuperSleepyBaby thanks and sorry to hear you struggled with it. Yes, I think counselling is probably the way forward. I thought support network might also help but it’s difficult as not in an English speaking country and makes things less easy to find sometimes. Counselling probably sensible but it sometimes feels like the ‘self care’ comes bottom of the pile after trying to get DD on lists for various help etc

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