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Behaviour/development

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Toddler 'deafness' ...

17 replies

prefernot · 20/11/2004 20:58

AGH!! My dd, 25 months, has developed this really annoying habit of not answering a single question I ask her. What's the best thing to do? Just stop asking her questions? I'm talking about the most basic ones like would you like a drink?

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misdee · 20/11/2004 20:59

ah good old selctive hearing. and also the NO if they do hear you.

prefernot · 20/11/2004 21:20

So, what do you do?

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misdee · 20/11/2004 21:23

tap her on the shoulder and make her look at me. and also say she cant have adrink till she says she wants one.

prefernot · 20/11/2004 22:09

Oh, Lordy, I've tried that. I can sit with my face right in front of hers asking her something but she just talks over the top of me with whatever little game she's involved with.

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Tommy · 20/11/2004 22:15

Aha - not just mine then?! Mine has also developed this really annoying habit of saying "Uh?" if he hasn't heard me properly. Try whispering "Would you like some chocolate?" and see if you get some response....

misdee · 20/11/2004 22:16

not much you can do about it tbh. but they do start listening again at some point.

Catbert · 20/11/2004 22:18

Totally agree... Asking her to come inside from the garden now, gets no response at all, as if I said nothing. Saying - come inside and you can watch Cbeebies... And she races across the lawn like nobody's business!

I employ the 1-2-3 tactic. After much persistence (answer me on the count of 3 or I'll switch the telly off, or no juice then, or coming to get you anyway, or I will put your shoes on for you if you don't want to help - whatever) and she usually complys by 1 or 2... Works a treat. Hard work though.

Twiglett · 20/11/2004 22:22

We went through a stage of that

I used to gently move his head so he was facing me, then point 2 fingers towards his eyes, then turn the fingers and point them towards mine and say 'Look at me' very clearly .. then once I had his attention I'd repeat the question

they're not doing it on purpose they're just so wrapped up in their old little worlds at that stage .. its actually quite cute

HTH

prefernot · 21/11/2004 08:31

Yes, it is cute that they get so intensely involved in doing things and I do try to keep my interruptions to a minimum but the odd things like getting dressed and eating are kind of, well, necessary!!

Sometimes I feel as though I'm kind of not there, or am just always talking to myself.

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suzywong · 21/11/2004 08:46

Catbert, I do the 1 2 3 thing two, but on occasions when it is a persistent thing (DS1 used to like to wiggle his fingers in my eyes while I was getting him dressed) I had to spit the dummy and go mental and then he remembered to listen to me when I asked him not to do it.

I try and be selectively deaf to certain whining requests but he always wears me down.

prefernot · 21/11/2004 20:47

suzy wong. Ditto the selective deafness on my part though I have nothing like dd's resilience!

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throckenholt · 22/11/2004 08:58

mine have selective deafness too - drives me mad ! But I think that they also have periods when there hearing is genuinely not so good - as the ear develops (and probably the brain too).

joash · 22/11/2004 09:41

I can't actually remember if my first two had selective hearing, but grandson definately has. At one stage I was genuinely worried about his hearing but the discovered that the "would you like chocolate?" whisper works.

However, I don't want to worry you, but, if you are concerned, get his hearing checked. My DS was the same and as I was worried the doctor booked him in for hearing tests. Turned out that he couldn't actually hear at certain pitches in one ear - apparently its quite common and over a few months his hearing levelled out until all was 'normal'.

joash · 22/11/2004 09:42

Sorry - should have said "Get HER hearing checked".

prefernot · 22/11/2004 11:13

Thanks joash but her hearing's fine I'm sure. She can hear things I can't half the time! We live in a flat and she can hear a neighbours dog barking floors away from us which I have to strain to hear.

No, this is a will thing.

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aloha · 22/11/2004 11:30

I find asking ds questions is frequently a waste of time - so I give him drinks without his having to ask (eg in the morning on waking at 10am, mid afternoon, at bedtime) and meals at regular times. It saves frustration IME to offer rather than ask. It i annoying though, I agree!

prefernot · 22/11/2004 21:02

That's ok with the drinks thing. Really I usually just give dd hers too. But when say you need them to sit down or to come down for a bath and they are just talking over the top of you and completely unaware of what you're saying ... grrrrrr ......

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