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Can't cope with DS behaviour

3 replies

bubbletrouble18 · 20/02/2022 16:48

Hi all, I'm hoping someone might be able to offer some advice/hand hold.

DS is nearly 5 and in the last 6 weeks we've noticed his behaviour has become out of control. I have spoken to his teacher about this who agrees that it's very hit and miss with him, he has full potential but his behaviour is holding him back. I've contacted the school nurse who is going to hopefully get back to me next week, and his teacher has also contacted her.

DS behaviour is always 100mph. Everything has to happen straight away. He doesn't walk, he sprints. Anger is rage, throwing, hitting, spitting, screaming. Happiness is screaming at the top of his lungs and running around at the speed of light. Sadness is sobbing, taking himself off and not wanting any comfort. He hates the attention being on anyone else. If DH and I are chatting, he stands between us talking over us, or starts doing something that will catch our attention (like drawing on walls). He is very rough with his little brother who is 11 months. No matter how much we take him out, what we do, where we go, how long we do it for, he NEVER runs out of energy. Our living room is an assault course for him, his bedroom is a fighting ring and he cannot sit still or concentrate on ANYTHING for more than 5 minutes. I don't think I've ever seen him sit still for more than that. If we don't get what he's asked for or do what he wants within a second he will run off to his room screaming and having a tantrum. I never leave him to it and always try to comfort/reason with him and tell him how much I love him and how I understand things can be hard sometimes.

He is such a lovely, caring boy, and he is so bright. Amazing with his reading and writing, his maths is coming along really well and he's never missed any milestones or regressed. He gets 11 hours of sleep at night, and a good diet (we've become very strict with sugar/unhealthy snacks).

I'm at a lose. I feel like I've failed him, and failed everyone. I'm trying so hard to be firm but fair, burn his energy, take him to all sorts of fun places, let him have some calm time, he has a good routine, a good social circle etc.

What am I doing wrong?? Do I need to speak to his HV/GP also? I'm really struggling as I'm starting to worry every single morning about what the day will bring.

Sorry for the rant, I'm just desperate.

OP posts:
bubbletrouble18 · 20/02/2022 16:53

Also just to add, we're very firm with screen time. 30 minutes at a max and we have full parental controls, we are always with him when he is watching anything on screen and engage with him about what he is seeing. Ask questions, discussing it etc.

OP posts:
bubbletrouble18 · 20/02/2022 18:07

Anyone?

OP posts:
ZooKeeper19 · 23/02/2022 20:35

Sorry no real advice, hopefully some more skilled people will be along. But you seem like an amazing mum to me, if that helps. Your son may have some additional needs, or he is really just going through a phase.

If he is great at school and with maths surely he can sit and focus on some things for a while. Does he have any sport/club activities where he can also learn to be a bit patient? You definitely have not failed him or anyone. It can just be really hard to be a parent, there are no rules to this whole thing so please be kind on yourself :)

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