Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Angry four-year-old boy

21 replies

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 10:11

Suddenly have a very angry four-year-old boy on hands, won't do anything asked, tantrums all day, no obvious cause. Moved nanny/house/nursey school 5 months ago but seemed to be settling down. Now impossible - any ideas?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 10:58

Bump - anybody else even had a similar experience?

OP posts:
Lonelymum · 18/11/2004 11:03

Could he be tired or sickening for something or is it more long term than that?

jellyhead · 18/11/2004 11:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:05

He got over a quite nasty chest infection about a week ago... Maybe he's just knackered - he keeps saying he hates everyone and hitting little brother, been like thsi for a few weeks, thought would get better when he got over his bug...

OP posts:
GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:06

He has also started talkinga bout God occasionally, don't know where that comes from, we are not a religious hosuehold...

OP posts:
jellyhead · 18/11/2004 11:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lonelymum · 18/11/2004 11:09

My ds2 went through a "religious" phase, when he was about3-4, talking about death and reincarnation a lot. I thought he was gong to be a priest! He can't remember that now and laughed when I told him the other day what he used to say.
It could well be that your ds is tired after his infection. Try a few earlier nights and see if that helps.

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:11

Thanks lonelymum and jellyhead, i think you could be right that he's just tired and he ahs had a lot of change in recent times and is perhaos getting to an age where he broods about where people come form and stuff. Early nights it is!

OP posts:
alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:15

Haven't got a clue what's causing it but my 4 and a half year old seems to be going through exactly the same thing at the moment and quite frankly he is driving me nuts.
He whines ,he whinges,he throws tantrums,he hits me, he screams.We just seem to be fighting all the time.He came out of school with a big smile on his face yesterday but by the time we reached the school gates he was crying.He has just got over tonsillitis so maybe this has something to do with it,but the whining was happening before.
Sorry to hijack your thread but it sounds so similar.
Someone said this term ,after starting school,is the hardest because by christmas they are exhausted.Maybe this is true?

alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:17

ghostof natt, are you me? my ds has been doing the religious thing too, how did god make the world etc? how does god make you better in heaven was another one.

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:20

Wow Alexsmum, that sounds exactly like us. It is making me sad because he was a pretty happy little boy before. I suppsoe it's not a great time of year either - someone also suggested to me that boys get a lot of testosterone at 4 so maybe that is contributing?

OP posts:
alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:24

I just don't know.I'm finding myself spending time wondering how I'm going to cope with trouble that I know is coming when I pick him up from school.He's such a sweet boy and didn't really do the terrible twos.Maybe he's giving it to me now!

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:27

What makes me sad is that I really don't look forward to spendng time with him at moment because there are so many fights and little brother (2) has started saying he hates people as well (trerendously fond of and influenced by big brother...)

OP posts:
Twiglett · 18/11/2004 11:29

At 4 boys get a hormone burst which is supposedly far worse than the 2 year old terrors

He can't control it and neither can you

You'll just have to ride it out

There are many many "F**kin' Fours" threads

probably doesn't help .. but at least you aren't alone (I'm looking forward to ours ... DS will be 4 in feb .. arrrrgggghhhh)

alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:29

we should get the two them together and let them scream at each other!!!

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:32

Thanks Twigglett, that helps to know, somehow managed to know about twos but not fours, must dig out my child behaviour books again. Is five better? Alexsmum, does yours cheer up with hsi friends, mine does but then is much more foul afterwards...

OP posts:
alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:42

yes he's fine when he's with his friends ,it's just when he's with me and dh.And if we have been to play at a friends house and I say it's time to go home he starts.basically we are the evil deprivers of fun,drinks,food,tvetc etc.if we don't jump when he says, it all starts.And we have so not brought him up to be like this.
Dh was putting him to bed the other night and I thought world war three was breaking out upstairs.no, it was just dh making ds clean his teeth.How awful of him!!

GhostofNatt · 18/11/2004 11:52

He really is the twin of mine. Am going to get the books and see if 5 is better...

OP posts:
alexsmum · 18/11/2004 11:55

lets hope eh??
To be honest he is four and 8 months and has always been a lovely little boy,smiley happy pleasant,and this change is recent.It's like someone has stolen my boy and replaced him with this horror!!! I hope it goes as quickly as it came.This is not a phase I like!

singersgirl · 18/11/2004 11:57

Hi
No particularly helpful advice (!) but just to let you know my son was exactly the same at 4. He started reception a young 4 (in August) and would often melt down after school (I got used to having the juice bottle thrown at me in the car). Exactly the same about leaving people's houses etc. Now at 6 he is better, and I have also found - in his case - that his behaviour is much more rational if he doesn't eat certain things. I do think a lot of it at 4 was tiredness - he used up so much energy being good at school that he hadn't got any good behaviour left at home. They know when it's OK to lose it, too; Mummy will always love them (even if sometimes with gritted teeth) but they can't afford to let their guard down at school or other people's houses. HTH somewhat, or at least consoles you that you're not the only one!

Lonelymum · 18/11/2004 13:34

Just to add, ds2, when he started school, was always very tired and ill a lot with minor colds etc. His birthday is just before Christmas and I can remember practically having to prop him up in those last few exciting weeks at school, then his birthday, his party and finally Christmas. Too much excitement, too much change, not enough sleep. It is 2 years on now, but I still dread the build-up to Christmas and his birthday because I remember that traumatic year he turned five. I think you are all experiencing something quite normal with your four year olds. All I can say is sorry! and persist with the early nights!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page