Nearly 4 year old does not care about punishments and I'm at the end of my tether

[Gastonia123]

I have a ds (5) and DD(3). My youngest has always been headstrong and extremely independent but she does not react to punishments at all. Most or the time she wont walk home from school nicely or listen when I ask her not to do something but every couple of weeks well have the mother of all naughty behaviour. Walking home today shes laid on the floor, thrown dirt at me and her brother, ran away, punched me, told me she hated me etc. The entire time I was praying nobody I knew would walk past. She does not care about punishments at all. I've tried naughty step consistently, positive reinforcement, confiscation, early bed, no tv etc and even a couple of times I've yelled when I was really at the end of my tether which I'm not proud of. She will laugh roll her eyes, sometimes cry but itll last 10 seconds then shell be back to her old behaviour. I dont know what else to try had anybody got any advice?

Do you get much one on one time with her? My son's behaviour is always worse when we've not had time just together (I've also got a 5 month old).

My son is the same age as your daughter, it's a tricky age definitely, you're not on your own.

If he lays on the floor when we're out I generally just keep a hold on him to keep him safe and wait it out. When he gets up I just ask him why he laid on the floor. He usually says he doesn't know and is a bit sheepish as I think he's aware he's been a bit silly!

I was about to post a similar thread. My DD is 4 and just does not care about punishments. I end up saying things I regret and I’m worried I will wear her self esteem down.
But it’s so hard to know what to do when she is hitting and pushing her brother and sister or saying unkind things to them all the time and nothing has an impact

@Anonymum30 she only gets 2 days at nursery and 3 days with me on her own. We do loads of one on one stuff together although it does usually get worse on the way home from the school run as opposed to on tge way when weve picked up her brother

@SorryMumma it's so frustrating isnt it. My eldest would do the naughty step and then apologise lovely but my youngest couldnt give 2 hoots. I do time out shell sit there twiddling her thumbs and giggling shell say sorry but her behaviour wont improve its infuriating

@Anonymum30 if she chucks herself down I've tried waiting it out then talking to her but shes so untethered by everything

@Gastonia123 this age is really hard going, just know you're not on your own