3 year old change in behaviour

[KatyRebecca84]

I know this is probably just a developmental thing and due to changes but my sons behaviour is really challenging. He’s always been a little bit cheeky but in the last three weeks, since being at in childcare 4 days a week, he’s been really different and hard work! He talks really well but has started talking in silly voices and like a baby, he will play with his food which he didn’t do before, he won’t listen to me.. at all. I need to ask him to get dressed or stop doing something dangerous and he ignores me numerous times and then has a strop, stamps his feed and crosses his arms and has a meltdown! I’ve tried to totally ignore, comfort or change the subject but it’s not working and is really getting me down.

There’s a child at nursery in particular he refers to who is naughty he says and who I saw being horrible and pushing his mum when she collected him from nursery.

I am sure this is all a developmental leap and due to change but any advice on dealing with it? How to make him listen to me without a full blown tantrum?!

Doesn’t help he sleeps terribly and that’s even worse right now.

Thanks for any advice!

How many days was he in Nursery for previously @KatyRebecca84?

He was one morning and two days with childminder. Now he’s two days in nursery and two with childminder. I assume its this change that has him a little all over the place!

It probably is the change but I'd keep an eye on it and maybe talk to his Key Worker next week if he's still going a bit challenging to see how he's settling in at Nursery.

As for his behaviour at home, sounds like you could do with a copy of Toddler Taming

@BunnyRuddington

It probably is the change but I'd keep an eye on it and maybe talk to his Key Worker next week if he's still going a bit challenging to see how he's settling in at Nursery.

As for his behaviour at home, sounds like you could do with a copy of Toddler Taming

Funnily enough nursery say he’s well behaved and the childminder said she’s noticed a change but he’s alot better for her than us!

Book sounds good thank you!

Is he perhaps tired? That's a fairly big step up in nursery/childminder, which generally seems to tired children out, plus you say he's not sleeping well. And if he's holding his behaviour together at nursery (and mostly for the childminder), he may simply have virtually nothing left for home.

Perhaps try keeping things very routine and undemanding in the evenings – a bit of screen time or stories to chill, simple, easy-to-eat tea (lots of 'something on toast' for us on nursery days), bed. Possibly keep things quite familiar and routine on days he's home for a bit as well until he's found his rhythm a bit more.

@skkyelark

Is he perhaps tired? That's a fairly big step up in nursery/childminder, which generally seems to tired children out, plus you say he's not sleeping well. And if he's holding his behaviour together at nursery (and mostly for the childminder), he may simply have virtually nothing left for home.

Perhaps try keeping things very routine and undemanding in the evenings – a bit of screen time or stories to chill, simple, easy-to-eat tea (lots of 'something on toast' for us on nursery days), bed. Possibly keep things quite familiar and routine on days he's home for a bit as well until he's found his rhythm a bit more.

Yes he’s definitely tired and hence hyper as is always the way! Will take your advice and stick to routine and easy evenings and hope things settle!

I send sympathy and solidarity – my DD is a little younger, but we've had a couple of rounds of this when we added a day at nursery, when she returned to nursery after a lockdown, and now when she's in the process of stopping napping at nursery. It's not exactly a cure-all, but it does seem to reduce the flashpoints, and I think it makes it easier for DH and me to cope with the behaviour when we have the perspective that it's mostly due to her just being too tired to cope. We've done more than a few rounds of teeth/toilet/nappy/pyjamas to a soothing repetition of 'Yes, you're tired, aren't you? Let's get you into bed so you can go to sleep.'

We do also baby her a bit if she wants when she's overtired – sometimes struggling to get a sock off or to get the last of the yoghurt onto the spoon is just too much.