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Speech delay, positive outcome

18 replies

Historyrepeating1234 · 19/01/2022 00:16

Hi to whoever reads this! We have had a very stressful 2 years (haven’t we all). Whilst in lockdown my my DH and I worried constantly about our then 20month old DD who showed little to no signs of talking. We couldn’t get hold of professional to discuss it and whenever I googled anything I found very few positive posts about the whole thing. So I wanted to share a little about our experience to offer reassurance to other parents going through the same thing. Developmentally she was typical with everything else. But encouraging speech was painful it felt like one step forward and 3 back. We knew the understanding was there because she could follow instructions and would mimic our behaviour (she’s incredibly observant!). After a very delayed 2 year check we got a speech therapy referral, it took nearly 8 months to get an appointment. By the time she was assessed, just before her 3rd birthday she had started to put 2/3 words together and was potty trained. The speech therapist gave us information sheets and specific ways of engaging, most of which I had been trying for months before hand. That was in July, since then she has gone from strength to strength and the last couple of months, last 2 weeks even we have seen a massive leap. She still doesn’t answer certain questions but other times information just pours out of her. She recalls things that happened months ago when she had almost no speech. Our DD has been this mute little sponge taking in every experience she has ever had, she just wasn’t ready to talk about it! And some days she is still quiet, others I can’t shut her up 😂. She counts, names colours, sings the alphabet and role plays with her toys and us. Is every syllable crystal clear , not all the time. Does her speech become slurred when she tired? Yes it does! But she can do it. I know that there will be many people experiencing what we have and that wait times for appointments are very long as services try to catch up. But if you are in my position please try not to worry, I know it’s easier said than done. So many people tried to tell me that children develop at their own pace and it really is true. Try not to listen to people who make negative comments and have faith that your child will talk in their own time. I have talked constantly to her, leaving pauses for answers she didn’t give and it has finally paid off. I hope this post stops someone in their tracks and stops them falling into a dark hole in the middle of the night. I would like to note that I completely understand there are at times very serious causes for speech delay and I am not trying to undermine that or suggest that parents not pursue professional guidances. I just wanted to say there is hopefully light at the end of the tunnel. For us 3 was the magic number and so much started to click into place 😊. If you are looking for help and someone to talk to I found I Can incredibly helpful and had a brilliant over the phone discussion with one of their therapists, all free of charge.

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Dbrea · 19/01/2022 07:31

Thank you so much 😭...I feel this post was meant to find me.. my little girl is 28 month with a handful of words and I'm just drowning in my own anxiety and google searches.. I could literally cry! This post was amazing and thank you from the bottom of my heart. I just hope the same happens for my little girl as it did yours 💞💞

milkieway · 20/01/2022 16:42

Aw thanks so much for your post it's so lovely to hear how she progressed. My DS just turned 2 and only has a handful of words he understands everything I say but he just doesn't seem able to copy words at the moment and everything comes out as "deh!" Most of the time!!
Do you mind me asking what your little girl was like age 2 did she have many words?
Like your little girl my DS understands absolutely every word we say and he seems such a clever bright spark! Just not talking !

Historyrepeating1234 · 21/01/2022 02:21

I’m so glad this post has been of help 😊. It really is awful when your so worried and there’s all these boxes the kids should be ticking and aren’t 🤦🏻‍♀️. At 2 she didn’t say much at all really, “no” and “ok”. Sometimes she would say “ta”, “dada” and “milk”. She also made lots of sounds. She didn’t say Mummy until she was around 3. Her nursery we’re doing phonics winter 2020 and I worked on that with her in the November lockdown (big mistake according to speech therapists) anyway she wouldn’t sing the songs but would act them out and pronounce the letter. She’s good with her alphabet now and amazed me yesterday by knowing her right and left. Just keep talking to him all the time and leaving pauses for him to answer. “Modelling” the answers and how they should speak is the advice we were given. I still do it now, when she’s not being polite etc. Try not to put any pressure on them to talk either, I was very upset when my in laws had held her to ransom over her lunch because she wouldn’t say “ta” or “thank you”, she just ended up crying. The speech therapist explained that pressuring them won’t work because on that day it’s probably a case of they can’t talk. I’m sure your little one will start talking all of a sudden and then you can shut them up 😂. It didn’t hold other aspects of development back, potty training was very successful she just said “poo” for everything which didn’t matter at all she got her point across! Started potty training properly when she was 2.7. I’ve also just remembered she didn’t nod or shake her head much either. All of it has happened gradually though. Most recently she has started talking in front of her group at pre school, where she has always been very quiet. Part of me wonders wether it’s a kind of shyness? My DD has always been physically very confident and demonstrative but not verbally. Believe me one day you’ll be wishing for silence again! The best advice we were given is just to enjoy your child as they are and it’s very true x

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milkieway · 21/01/2022 07:28

Thanks for your reply
Sounds like she's doing amazingly well!
What sort of age did she start copying words / saying new ones?
We get occasional new words but it's very slow! Lots of gestures and he uses his own sounds to refer to things so like you say he's actually pretty good getting his message across
Thanks for the tips too Smile really helpful
I think I just can't imagine him talking properly it feels like it's just never going to happen at the moment as he just says his same old few words / sounds he's had for ages !

Historyrepeating1234 · 21/01/2022 12:44

It’s sounds like your son is very similar to how my daughter was. Her vocabulary didn’t start to grow until she was 3. And it’s just the last couple of months she’s really started to repeat what we say. She comes out with a lot of new words spontaneously too. I thought it would never happen. Now I’m struggling to remember her being quiet!

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Dbrea · 21/01/2022 13:50

Can I ask if your LO just had a speech delay or is there any other factors involved, i.e autism for example.

Historyrepeating1234 · 21/01/2022 15:24

It was just speech delay, she didn’t show any other signs of autism etc. My nephew is a few months older and also had speech delay. We were assessed but sent away with no further action, my nephew had speech therapy remotely during lockdown and made very good progress. But it does seem like there might be other SEN. The speech therapist did say it can be hereditary.

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Rorysmam · 21/01/2022 21:02

Hi, my son is 2.5 years old. He babbles constantly, he uses hand gestures when he does and puts effort in. He says mama now and again. Has said oh dear a few times. That's it. He follows most instructions, he can remember actions I made up to nursery rhymes, has an action for his gloves with cartoons on, rockets fly your hands up in the air, silly things like that. I have FOUGHT with health visitor since one year old about his speech. I know that's quite early but at the time he was totally silent but had babbled a little before. Then began blabber again soon after but never developed from there. Nursery have listened to me, he started in September and they referred to speech therapy this week. Can someone please help me with any activities in the meantime? Cannot get in the nursery at the moment due to restrictions they have and I don't want to wait months down the line. Thank you in advance.

Historyrepeating1234 · 21/01/2022 22:53

It’s so hard, I would look at I Can. It’s a website all about speech and there’s lots of ideas there. My daughter also really liked Yakka Dee on CBeebies. We were encouraged to use phrases like ready, steady, go and pause for the child to say “go”. If my daughter said milk or gestured that she wanted a drink. I would say “please can I have some milk mummy?” Then pause for her to attempt to say it, it doesn’t matter if they don’t say, but keep demonstrating. I was also told to give her options “blue cup or pink cup” , “banana or apple”. Then repeat the one they choose. It’s painful at times and a lot of the time she said nothing. But it happened eventually. Our nursery put in a speech therapy referral for us, I hope you get a referral and some reassurance soon x

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Rorysmam · 23/01/2022 10:28

Thank you for the response. I'll definitely look at i can, hadn't come across them during my Google search. A lot was NHS advice which I followed. He loves books, gesturing and doing actions to songs. The actions I've made up so I know he understands things. It is hard, incredibly so, I believe that IF there is a problem it should be fixed sooner rather than later but speaking to health visitors etc has been a complete waste of time. I'm so thankful for his nursery teachers, they're amazing.

Rorysmam · 23/01/2022 10:29

Oh and yakadee... loves yakadee. Every day we watch but not sure he's listening as he constantly laughs and squeals in delight Smile

Scratchybaby · 24/01/2022 11:31

Well done @Historyrepeating1234 what a lovely story! It's so nice to read some good news stories when it comes to speech delays. Well done on all the hard work and persistence.

Can also recommend the tricks and tips you shared. My son has a speech delay as well and, at nearly three, he still doesn't speak in sentences yet but his receptive and expressive language has come on leaps and bounds in the last few months and at the pace he's now progressing I'm really hopeful he'll catch up. We did a lot of "filling in" activities like you and it's like it finally enabled us to crack open the flood gates when before he was just not attempting to say anything beyond "biscuit".

The first one I did was getting his cereal for breakfast one item at a time. He LOVED rice crispies so was always excited and motivated to engage at the prospect of getting cereal, so I broke down the process into "let's get a _ (hold up a bowl, show him, say bowl, repeat each time until he starts saying bowl when I leave a gap for him to fill) then milk, spoon, etc etc until he was able to say each word, and start using them in wider contexts. He really enjoyed the game as it just made the anticipation of rice crispies even more exciting for him, and we applied this approach to all sorts of situations.

The other thing was filling in words in books. Even if at first it's just a sound like "buh" (that's where he started), if you pause and look at them expectantly, it helps prompt them to say the word to keep you reading and it does eventually start sounding like the word. Now we wake up in the morning to the sound of him laying in bed trying to recite the Gruffalo books, clearly practicing his pronunciation of the trickier words.

It's not just the relief that he's finally progressing with his speech (I hate it when people dismiss the worry mums have as being petty comparison of their children to others) - it's so indescribably wonderful to hear his beautiful little voice, and to hear what's preoccupying his mind. Even if right now he mainly wants to talk about Julia Donaldson books, it's still the best!

Wednesdayafternoon · 24/01/2022 13:42

Wow I am so glad to see this post. My eldest son had A speech to delay so I should know better really. With him he had glue ear which I think contributed to his delay, but I don't think it necessarily was the outright cause of it. He could say perhaps two or three words by the time he was turning 2 but between him being 2.5 and three years old his vocabulary shut up a massive amount and I think that I would probably say The time he was about 3.5 to 4 years he had completely caught up with his speech.
My youngest is now 20 months old and he has a speech delay. He makes sounds which sound like words which he sings along to certain songs, but he doesn't call out mummy or say any words when he wants something. He bubbles all the time and he's very affectionate, but there is definitely a gap in communication with him. I shouldn't be worrying about this because I've been to it before and I know full well that they will talk when they're ready to talk, but I can't help but worry about him. I'm upset that I'm going through this again...
But I'm so pleased to hear your story and see this post. I think I will take a screenshot of it and keep reading it to myself when I find myself falling into a spiral of worry!!

Springmama · 29/01/2022 08:01

@Rorysmam I would absolutely recommend a book It takes two to talk by Hanen, brilliant guide for parents of children with speech delays. My son went from 6-8 words at 20 months to 20 at around 2.2m( but v inconsistent) to now at 2.9 he knows hundreds of single words& is beginning to put 2&3 words together& has even started to sing songs. My son has an ongoing hearing problem& there may be also other sen issues but he is doing so well. The progress was so slow at the beginning I thought he would never talk.

EmilieSpr · 21/02/2022 15:59

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pamplemoussee · 08/08/2022 10:09

I just wanted to add another positive outcome here too now my little boy is 2years7months he is talking up a storm now, he's got thousands of words and using sentences too, it really did all come at once

Historyrepeating1234 · 28/11/2022 05:16

Hi everyone, just a quick update. I hope all your little ones are getting the help and support they need. Wow how things have changed since January! My DD started school in September and the change has been incredible. Her speech is conversational, she adores school and has made lots of friends. Any worried parents scrolling in the middle of the night, it does get better. Just enjoy your children for who they are and every stage their at x

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RiverRock22 · 10/03/2023 00:07

@Historyrepeating1234

One of the best rabbit holes I have ever fell down during my late night scrolling.

I am left feeling positive and invigorated to face the challenges ahead.

Bumping this up as it’ll hopefully settle the mind of another late night scroller with a speech delayed toddler.

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