New ADHD diagnosis

[Nonono11]

Hello, my 8 year old has just been diagnosed with adhd, and I’m really really struggling with the diagnosis. I’m not surprised as I have suspected this for a while, but hearing the doctor confirm it really threw me and I’m feeling so down about it. Since he was about 18 months I’ve felt something wasn’t right. I put it down to post natal depression that I had my 2nd daughter was born around then. It feels like his whole life I’ve just been questioning myself, my parenting and to now hear he does have a problem and it’s not in my head feels emotional. I’m Sad for my son and worried about the future. Not sure how I’m going to cope as he gets older as every year he seems to struggle more. Sorry this post seems very me me me, I’m just really struggling

Hiya. I've been where you are. My daughter was diagnosed at 6. She was terrible at school to begin with and I had my parenting questioned constantly. The diagnosis was bittersweet. Part of me was relieved that I wasn't imagining an issue. The other part of me was worried for the future and what it would hold for my wee girl. It was a really emotional time.

Well, she's 17 now. She's thriving. She's doing great at school, she is polite, she has lots of friends, she's very artistic. She's amazing!

She still has some challenges (mostly sleep related and no concept of time) but she's finding ways to manage these things.

I'm sure with such a supportive mum, your little lad will be the same.

My youngest son was diagnosed before 2 with severe ADHD. Having the label opened doors for him. He had a place at a special nursery then school between 2 to 3 paid for by the LEA SEN funds. He then moved to a fully inclusive primary that worked with outside agencies, CAHMS tier 3 and all. Because of the early support he made it to secondary where he started to fly.Okay there were some fun moments as he is gifted and could come up with some fairly unique ways to manage his teachers and Ed psychs…but he loved sixth form. He went on to a higher apprenticeship, did a pt degree as part of that and now works full time. Has friends. still does not sleep much so he spends his spare time troubleshooting and repairing mechanical objects for people in our local community and gardening for older folk who can no longer manage power tools.

Hopefully having his ADHD officially recognised will begin to open doors for him. Give yourself time to let this gently settle on you. Even when you are expecting a diagnosis the finally having it confirmed can leave you feeling like your feet have been swept from under you. If you have been signposted towards local support it might be worth looking at what is available. Speak with his school SENCO so they can bring in any additional available outside help for him. There may be a local outreach team able to give additional support and resources to help your son in school.