Nursery concert

[Mummyofboys88]

Morning all. I just had about 5 videos of the class singing some Christmas songs posted from the school nursery. I feel quite sad as my DS (who was 4 in September) is usually a very confident and happy boy, was standing like a statue in the videos and not joining in. He sang a bit of some of the songs but he was also the only child (of about 18) not wearing the tinsel hat they gave them. There was one day last week when the teacher causally told me on pick up that he was a bit grumpy that day and didn't want to join in. Could have been the same day. Just feel sad for him as he usually loves singing, dancing etc. He just stood out like a sore thumb to me

That would have been my ds. He hated things like that. He quite enjoys the stage now aged 14yo.

Thank you for replying I just felt a bit sad watching the videos as I thought my DS would have loved it and join in with everything.

Bless him. My DS was/is like this. His nursery concert when he was 4, he sang a tiny bit, and did a tiny bit of the actions, but mainly just stood there. I already knew it wasn’t his sort of thing (he sings at home but very different on a stage amongst 40 children and a huge audience of parents!) and was really proud of him for doing a little bit.

His Christmas show this year (age 6) was recorded, but I’m so so proud of him as he sang every song and did his “lines” well. He wasn’t as animated with the actions as his classmates, but it’s not his thing. The tinsel hat thing would’ve been my DS too.

When his class has a “disco” he won’t join in and just sits there. He would hate a disco based party (although sometimes he tells me he wants to go to a disco he’s only 6 after all).

Thank you for replying. I guess everything isn't everyone's thing. I was terrible for just standing there doing nothing in my shows, but my parents expected it as I was painfully shy. My DS isn't the slightest bit shy but definitely knows his own mind and if he's not in the mood for something he won't do it. I think I was feeling a bit sad as it's his first ever Christmas concert and we weren't able to be there to see it. Same for so many other parents and it's rubbish.

Had mine recently, as it was outside we got to go. Everyone sang away and my DD (who had been singing the songs all week at home) stood there and tried not to cry throughout and then burst into tears at the end!

She was fine 10 mins later and still enjoys singing the songs at home now - I think the whole thing was just a bit overwhelming for her. They are very tiny so I wouldn’t worry too much x

@Mummyofboys88

Thank you for replying I just felt a bit sad watching the videos as I thought my DS would have loved it and join in with everything.

It is hard when it seems like every other child is loving it and you know they can do it, but just don't perform.

My ds' first few included:
He was the only one not in costume as he refused to wear it.
He was one of the shepherds-minus soft toy sheep as in the dress rehearsal the shepherds had mounted a protest which included them thumping each other with their soft toys. So they improvised and shouted "baaa" loudly at inopportune moments.
He spent the entire performance sulking because he wanted to sit with Mary who was his best friend. She spent the performance waving at him and ignoring Joseph. At the end when people were wanting to take photos of the lovely tableau, she went over and sat in a corner with him and they ignored all calls to go back.
He said someone else's line and refused to say his own.
He span round on his chair and spent the entire performance with his back to the audience. He did shout his line clearly.

Funny thing is, he does actually quite enjoy performing. He does drama and has been in panto and everything, but it was something about school nativities that didn't bring out the best. 🤣🤣🤣

@MargaretThursday I can imagine my own DS doing a lot of those things!

It is hard OP, I now have two DC and I think it relaxes you a bit more as you see how different children can be. I do find my eldest DC a bit challenging when he refuses to do things but hey, that’s who he is.

Hilariously, I take my younger DC to a music and dance class I used to take elder DS to when he was 3. It’s free play and then songs and dancing/actions at the end, DS always got stuck into the free play but would carry on playing when it felt like all the other children would come and join in the singing and dancing. I genuinely felt like he was the only one not joining in.

Now my younger DC is the one right at the front of the group in the singing and dancing, 100% focussed, copying every move and singing every song! And guess what, the majority of the children at the class don’t join in and carry on with the free play it can often feel like your child is the only one but I think it’s rarely the case.

I still remember the playgroup nativity when ds2 was 4 and ds3 was 2 - ds3 was a lamb, and sobbed his socks off for the whole thing. The only way he’d stay in the nativity at all was on dh’s lap. He was the saddest little lamb in the stable.

My DS was like that, all pale face and shadows under his eyes after a long term, stood picking his nose at the back of the stage 🤣

Ah so glad it's not just my DS My eldest is 6 and is very shy, so wouldn't have surprised me if it was him. My 4 year old is so confident and outgoing so this shocked me a bit. I had visions of him having speaking parts in reception and all sorts maybe he will...our kids love to keep us on our toes don't they after all?!