Super alert baby

[lykfay]

Hey everyone,

I have a 7 month old DD she is my first and she is super alert and very demanding ! She needs constant activity to keep her happy, Shes quite Whiny at times. She can literally hear a pin drop and I’m pretty sure she has eyes in the back of her head. Really nothing gets past her.

She is so stubborn and so strong willed. I’m finding it difficult to wean her. She seemed to start off ok but I think she’s teething and it’s putting her off. She keeps turning her head away all the time.

Since day one she has been quite difficult. When she was born she did the loudest longest cry anyones ever heard. She was quite unsettled as a newborn but I always put that down to her having silent reflux which caused her a lot of discomfort. She’s never liked her mosses basket or cot, she’s always wanted to sleep on me and would always wake up if I tried to put her down. She has been very clingy with me and still is. Only really seems to be happy if she’s being held and bounced around.

I’ve always found it difficult getting out the house with her especially when she was a newborn and being so unsettled all the time.

She answers to her name ( most of the time ), she looks when I point at things, She does socially smile ( even though it’s hard work for the poor person trying to get her to smile ) but she isn’t the most smiley baby I’ve ever seen. I get a couple of smiles a day and that’s it. She laughs ( cough laughs ) again hard work to get her to laugh but I’ve not actually had a belly laugh. She does give eye contact but it’s not amazing. She looks at you and the looks away but she definitely doesn’t avoid it.

She just seemed a lot more smiley and I definitely received more eye contact before she became so alert.

She has hit all her milestones so far except for babbling. She never really did much cooing as a baby but she definitely babbles the only thing is she doesn’t do it very often.

I've struggled with constantly worrying something is wrong with her, all sorts of neurological problems and my latest: autism.

I've spent the past 7 months fighting the way She is, feeling hard done by and honestly not accepting her. I have been in tears most days through exhaustion.

I find it really difficult going out to baby groups as everyone else’s baby is so chilled and content. Seems like they would sit there forever.
I just imagined having a baby so differently.

She isn’t the best sleeper. Tends to catnap in the day and wakes up about 3-4 times in the night but she’s fed to sleep so I think that might be the problem so trying to work on that.

I just wondered if you had a similar baby in the past how they turned out?

I’ll openly admit I’m a whittler and overthink everything but I just can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right because she seems so different to other babies.

Thanks in advance and thanks for listening to my worries. X

Yes I had a baby completely the same. He's a very relaxed teen abs doing well at school.

Instead of fighting how she is, I would try to accept it and concentrate on meeting her needs. If you do that she'll feel more secure.

If she has silent reflux, is she on any meds and have they been reviewed recently? That might help. I'm assuming CMPA and Tongue Tie have been ruled out?

Sorry forgot to add. My super stubborn DD would never be spoon fed. We had to offer her the food on a tray abs let her feed herself. Might be worth a try?

My oldest son was exactly like this. He is 3 now and is an amazing toddler! He just didn't suit being a baby. He was alert from the moment he was born and was frustrating his entire baby life. He is still incredibly strong willed and hard work but is an absolutely brilliant toddler and suits being 3 much more than he suited being a baby! It feels bittersweet to look back through his baby photos now. He was cute but oh my such hard work!

I have experienced everything you have written. The first time we went out when he was a week old, a lot of people commented on how alert he was. He was on the larger side so people thought he was 3 months old and were shocked when I said he was a week old. He was always intense, demanding and always got bored easily as he grew.

I was never able to feed him with a spoon as well. He was never happy playing, never content with anything. We probably spent hundreds and hundreds of pounds on toys and gadgets so he could give me a break for 2 seconds to rush to the loo. Leaving the house was impossible, getting ready with him was impossible, entertaining him outside was impossible. He is just miserable. He is almost 3 years old and is into everything.

I haven't enjoyed one bit of motherhood and I'm still struggling. The terrible twos are awful and I hope that goes smoothly for you. I think he just hated being a baby and now hates being a toddler. I'm hoping when he hits 3 in 4 months time, things will change for us. He is still clingy, high needs and literally sucks the life out of me. He is all over me, pulling me, climbing on me

He is very gorgeous though. Has the most amazing brown eyes, dimples everywhere and has this is extremely cheeky smile. Me and dh jokes that if he didn't look so gorgeous and cute, we would have left him by the bins long time ago as he isn't worth the trouble (obviously joking🙃)

The 'very alert' comments started at 3 days old for DD, and she just doesn't need that much sleep. We mostly rolled with it, accepted she needed something to do/watch/listen to at all times, and it mostly worked (except when she was determined to master a new skill and it wasn't happening fast enough for her –those were not my favourite weeks).

She also went completely off solids when teething (fair enough, really) and preferred to feed herself. We could hold out a spoon for her to grab and shove in her mouth, though. (We held on to the handle as well to begin with; this was apparently acceptable as long as we were merely steadying it.)

Have you tried taking her out in a sling/baby carrier so that she can be close to you and still see what is going on? She's about the age where you can start to do a world-facing front carry or a back carry, both of which DD much preferred to inward-facing.

Yes, my son also hated inwars facing slings and I mean HATED! He absolutely screamed. He was so much happier when he was outward facing. And also when he was in a situation up pram, rather than in a bassinet on his back. He is lovely now though- but it was a tough first two years or his life for me! I now see how hard he is because his little brother is so easy!

DS1 was like this. The GP commented on it at his 8 week check when he was trying to pull at his stethoscope.
Would never sit placidly in the pram, stopped napping at twelve months, nursery even moved him up a class as a toddler a son he was so full on. I remember as a twenty month old him pointing and saying 'they're daddy's keys' when someone else tried to take them. Always on the bossy side!
Now a very smart, confident 19 year old away at uni. But the younger years were hard.

@llykfay any updates