16 month dd won't talk. (not can't, just won't)

[entropy]

So far she has said bye bye, ball, boo, pear, apple, more, again, hello, popo (trying the cats name) and no. but ball is the only word she has said on more than one occasion. She has such a funny look on her face when she says them, like she knows she is doing something really clever! But she won't repeat them and its starting to drive me a little mad. She is far far more likely talk to the cat or dog rather than to people. She is most verbal with my dad, who has a tendency to put the TV on if she doesn't demand his attention.

How should I handle it? Is it a power thing for her? And if so is not reacting with OTT praise the way to go to get more words out. Or should I be constantly encouraging her and talking to her??

Or should I just enjoy the peace and quiet while it lasts?

Oh enjoy the peace, by the sounds of things it is a combination of confidence and being able to wind you up- she may not have the confidence to say things out loud and it has the added bonus of winding you up.

I would just talk to her all the time- encouraging her when she does talk even if she gets the words muddled up and when she doesnt just chat away as if there was nothing wrong!!

Jut wait til she gets to 2 and a half- I cant shut mine up... ever... even talks in her sleep! Do you wanna swop?

Don't pressure her to talk - and saying "Can you say x, y, z" is pressure when you're 16mo.

Just chat round her and respond to what she says, rather than applauding her saying anything at all - because that's how she'll learn what conversation is.

Ds2 is 15 and says bugger all apart from 'digger' and 'dirty'.
Should I be worried then?

LOTHATI

i know I'm being one of those competitve mums again.... but in my defence dd has pysical SN and the doctors are watching her like a hawk for any kind of develomental delay. she had to see the a physiotherapist as she couldn't roll at 6 months (managed it a week later) and had it documented that she had speech delay at 12 months as she doesn't say mama and dadada!

she is a bright little button in so many ways (jigsaws and shape sorters are her thing) and I just want to get her talking so that we can let the SALT team concentrate on the kids that need them and to let us spend more time at playgroups than hospitals!

you could be on to something with the confidence thing LMM. she look her first steps over 3 months before she became confident enough to walk regularly. can't keep her still now!

my gut feeling is not to pressure her and its nice to have some reassurance from you guys. thanks for your posts

Sixteen months is young for talking. And sixteen months is too young to imagine that she has a 'power thing.'

Just relax, entropy. Things will all slot into place in their own good time.

Babytalk by Sally Ward is a great book. East to read, lots of tips on language and talking and also things to watch out for. Lots of idea on encouraging language development and also a list of things not to do! Lots of case studies as well.

I had to watch ds2 and ds3 insanely for developmental problems (they were high risk). It's enough to drive you mad. I found having cut offs helped. So for example I had a cut off of 18 months for pointing to things of interest. So if, by 18 months they weren't pointing to objects of interest using their index finger then it would be off for a referral. I then avoided as much as possible assessing what they were doing before the cut off. KNowing that I would be picking up a problem if there was one at 18 months helped me to stop obssessing over everything they did. Hard though. They were both fine btw.

SNAP!

have dd who is also 16 months... she definitely wasn't saying mama and dada at 12 months (and in fact still doesn't say dada).

we have had..... cat, tractor (older brother!), bear and shoes over the past few weeks but very much on her terms (ie will not say them to order)

she is fine though - very happy and no developmental issues that i can see....

i don't think you are being pushy, and i think this might well be a power thing - our dd is certainly a little madam and is trying to show the world who's boss.... having said that, i'm sure it will pass - they will eventually start chatting and then we will wonder what all the fuss was about!

I've ordered babytalk. Thanks Yurt for the recommendation. I feel a lot happier when I understand the stages of development so hopefully reading up will get rid of my worries.

gladders, I'm desperate for dd to say dada! glad she isn't the only one who wont perform to order

Out of interest, then, what is the 'cut off' for speech/language onset? (genuinely interested).

DD2 is 16m and has considerably less vocab than dd1 at the same age (she says about 5 words). Am really not concerned, and had it down as having an older sibling that talks for her.

When would you need to start being worried?

Unsure ,Bernard.

I got worried with dd at about 16 months cos she did not have a range of "babble".She did ca and ga sounds and mummmma and dada but not much else.

She has multiple problems not just speech.I think as long as your little one has a good range of babble,and is beginning to put together some words,I woukld not worry.As you say an older sib often talks for the younger one

I think the reason I've not worried is that she has no problems making herself understood

She also understands us (i.e 'DD2, go and get your shoes from the shoe box')

She copies sounds/babble back to us, too.

I'm looking forward to being called 'Mamma' as opposed to 'Dadda', though...

16 months is very young to talk. I don't know about the others but DS1 didn't say a single word by then and I never thought it was an issue. He did say Daddy quite young but he was calling everybody Daddy, including complete strangers on the bus which was sometimes a bit embarassing. As to refering a 6 month old to physio because she's not turning over, well that's a first. DS1 wasn't turning a 6mo, never crawled, but was walking at 10 MO.

my dd is 17m, and like Bernards, understands quite a lot & can follow instructions but only says 'yes'(da) & quack. My Hv said as along as they babble, and understand what you say then there is no real need to worry, so I'm not. Not as if I can do anything about it anyway is there?

I know it's an old cliche but my dd only began to speak 'age appropriate' once she started nursery at 30 months old. She'd even been refered for speech therapy assessment by the health visitor but the speech therapist said there's nothing wrong with dd speech, she just didn't want to talk.

Dd now has her gang of friends, with whom she talks very well. She talks - a lot now. A talks a lot better than most 3 year olds I know.

So my advice: enjoy the peace and quiet while it lasts and don't listen to other parents and health visitors. For future advice, if in doubt, go direct to your GP or speech therapist. PCT should give you details.

Have only read OP.

Never put pressure on your child to talk! It can be counter=productive.

I can recommend a book called 'Baby talk' by Dr Sally Ward. It explains the whys and wherefores of speech and language development in a helpful way with practical examples.

And have been there, done that. (dd highly articulate, ds non talking until borderline worry time)

oaktree lol at quack

I guess my worry was that she doesnt babble. her words usually come like bolts from the blue never to be repeated. she moves her mouth without making sounds sometimes like she is rehearsing things quietly. She is like that with lots of stuff though. she learns things and once she has them cracked looses interest in practicing them.

and I agree that the physio referral for not rolling at 6 months was ridiculous! and its more panic referrals like that that I'm trying to avoid. although I have to say that the advice that the physio gave us got dd rolling within days and crawling within a coule of weeks.

myrrhcy - i've ordered myself a copy of babytalk for xams. it was recommended earlier in the thread but thanks for seconding the recommendation.