My 4 year old ds lies shamelessly and we are stumped as to how to deal with it.

[trulymadlydeeply]

We have 2 older children, neither of whom lies (we don't think). We have always taken the line that they'll be punished less if they own up to something, to emphasis that the lie is more serious than the misdemeanour, but our youngest ds swears black is white and seems to believe it himself.

Has anyone got any tips on what we could do to avoid him being carted off in a police car in later years?

normal behaviour

just explain you prefer the truth and be honest yourself, it is surprising how often adults lie IMO

mmmm, he may well believe it himself, that is the pproblem

kids of this age still have magical thinking and he may think that if he says something happened, he can make that be true!

At four they are only just beginning to get the hang of the difference between truth and falsehood and between wanting something to be true and being able to make it be true. Do as Franny says; if he's still doing it to the same extent in a year or so then you may have an issue but at this age it's well within the normal range of behaviour.

Normal behaviour for a 4 year old. A lot of children at this age still confuse fact with fiction.

my four yo dd told grandparents, aunts and uncles as well as all her cousins that she had been stung by a wasp and taken to hospital and nearly died. No such thing has ever happened. DH and I were just sat there speechless. I think sometimes it is just overactive imagination. I hope so anyway

I agree. Once children this age have imagined something in thier head it is as true as if it had happened. Sometimes they genuinely can't distinguish.

Someone told me that until they are 6 children's brain waves oprate at the same level as an adult high on drugs.

If it is about 'imaginary events' that he volunteers, just absorb non-comitally, if it is under presure of questioning about misdemeanors, i would exert ;less pressure and do lots of 'we do THIS' rather than 'don't do this' iyswim.

Agree with previous posters. Both my children would attempt to lie their way out of pressure at this age, and as they both went through quite a destructive stage, it was quite worrying. The best one I always thought was dd claiming that little brother had been drawing the letters of the alphabet on the dining room carpet with a felt tip pen: he'd have been one of the brightest 6-month-olds in existence!
The good news is, it hasn't left any lasting legacy: once they got to the age of 6 or 7, they seemed to be able to tell facts from fiction and feel shamed by the thought of lying.
Initially, I let myself get drawn into long unproductive inquisitions, when Blu's approach would have been much better; things did improve once I learnt more of that approach+ they matured anyway.

Thanks, guys! I've never come across it before because I don't think it would occur to the others to lie, but he's such a totally different personality. I feel reassured to know I haven't got anything to worry about unduly.