My dd is unwilling to poo - please help

[michie40]

My dd1 is 3 and has been fully potty trained for a while - including being dry at night.

However she doesn't seem to like passing solids. She poos very infrequently - about once a week and sometimes not even that. She is obviously uncomfortable and seems to hold it in until the last minute. I don't think it hurts when she goes because sometimes she soils herself at night and doesn't notice until she wakes up.

I don't know what has led to this and my DH and I are trying to play it down as though its not a big thing in front of dd. However I am a bit worried and don't know how to solve this.
Has anyone had similar problems or got any ideas.
Thanks

I'm currently going through the same thing with my 3 year old ds. He was late starting toilet training but has now mastered wees. He did manage a few solids at first but has now completely regressed, waiting for his nappy to be on at night before going. Today he even did one in his swim nappy when we were in the pool. I've tried not to get too worried as I know other children that have been through this and have come out the other side, but it's a real pain. I just want the whole thing finished. Sorry, not much help am i?

Thanks evelina - its nice to know I am not the only one.
It is actually quite reassuring to think that it might just be a bit of regression and that she will eventually get over it.

Is she using a potty or the loo? This may sound wierd but perhaps she doesn't like it dropping (the sound?) and possibly splashing her? You could put some cling film (large piece so it sits a few inches above the water) over the bowl, held down by the seat? what about

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My ds was 4 before he would go for a poo - he used to hold it in for 9 - 11 days and would scream and scream in pain. He was under the hospital for over a year on all sorts of medicine - nothing helped. I was beside myself with worry - until one day he just sat on the toilet and went..... i couldn't believe it. I beleive they will do it when they are ready and not before. I really do feel for you but hang in there

My DD was in knickers at 2, doing really well, but poos were a nightmare and she would only ever poo in her pants, never on the potty or in the toilet, and we'd see her heading off up the garden where she'd stand with her legs tightly crossed until she couldn't hold it in any more. It was a nightmare.

We made light of it for a year, worried that if we made an issue out of it, we'd damage our child for life, but when she was 3 1/2 we agreed a date by which she'd poo on the toilet; and we said we'd tell her off if she didn't. This worked for a bit, but then she seemed to regress and she poo-ed in her pants again.

We gave her a bollocking and that was it - she stopped! She's 6 now, and still seems to have issues every so often about "letting it out", but on the whole her pants are clean!

Tough problem, though. Good luck!

Simerlar problem here.
DD1 was great and then hit the same age as you guys,her baby sisiter also arrived (we thought that was the reason). We tried to be unstressful and the doctor suggested lactulose (complete rubbish, but hey we didnt know-prunes much better!)months moved on . Then we tried a star chart . One star for every motion. The more productive visits ,the sooner the barbie doll(rod for my own back ,that one).
Out of that lot still dont know what did the trick only something did(maybe it was time). Sugest you visit doc for your own peace of mind.Dd not doing this to be naughty,you are going to have to work this through with even more of the patience you are already showing .
Good luck

Thanks for everyones help - i am reassured now that it is not that unusual.
I think I will try the prunes moyasmum.

hi michie

this is very common and frustrating!
I have the same prob with my dd now 4 she was fine until 8 months ago did a hard poo that made her bleed a little poor thing. after that she would hold it in until she messed herself she was so scared. i took her to the doc who put her on laxatives to keep it soft and another med to encourage the bowels to relax. if they hold it in the bowels leak and they really cant control this.
she still wont go on the toilet but i have a large potty she can still sit on in front of the telly and she will go on her own as long as she is relaxed. if she gets upset or ill she goes back to 'holding' i think it may be a control thing? but if i dont make an issue of it she will sort herself out again in a day or two, but i if dont hold my tongue (very hard when you can see shes in pain) she can hold nearly a week!
it is getting better and will pass so dont worry but i would take dd to docs if you can before it becomes too much of a habit and definately not make an issue out of it, it will stress her more.
good luck !